Til the Sky Turned Blue Book VI
by Jennifoofighter
Summary: The end of the journey.
1. Chapter 1

TITLE: 'Til the Sky Turned Blue – Book VI of VI

AUTHOR: Jennifoofighter

RATING: PG

KEYWORDS: MS, D/OC, VM, and friendship all around.

SPOILERS/TIMELINE: Post 'End Game'

DISCLAIMER: Hank and Co. own everything _Without a Trace_. No copyright infringement is intended ...yada, yada, yada, I get nothing but the satisfaction of having them do what I want if only for a little while.

NOTE: Thank you Pru for the 'Book' idea. It makes it much easier to organize.

SPECIAL THANKS: Sammy and Broni, Thank you for the reviews, the constructive criticism, and most of all, the encouragement to actually post it. You guys rock.

AUTHORS NOTE: I am asking you to take a journey with me. For some it might be a bumpy ride but I promise that you will be very happy once we arrive at the final destination.

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"_A home is any four walls that enclose the right person." - Helen Rowland _

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Martin stared at the poster on the wall of a family playing with their Irish Setter in the park and felt a small lump in his throat. He had thought that he might feel a little more numb to these kinds of things by now but still, two months later, seeing images like this still felt like a kick to the gut.

"I'm sorry, Martin. I can't find anything wrong with Milo," Simon commented as he returned to the exam room. Simon Murphy was Milo's veterinarian. He was a thin older man with a bushy head of hair and wire framed glasses. "As far as we can tell Milo is in perfect health."

"There has to be something wrong. He hasn't been eating; he doesn't have the energy he used to; he hardly ever wags his tail…he just hasn't been himself," Martin argued as he pet Milo who just lay with his head on his two front paws looking at him with his sad big brown eyes.

Simon leaned against the counter and asked, "How are you doing Martin?"

"What does this have to do with me?" He looked over where Simon stood; the counter behind him cluttered with jars filled with heartworms and tapeworms.

"Dogs are very intuitive creatures," he replied as he pushed up his glasses with his index finger. "If you're happy, he's happy; if you're sad, then he's sad."

"Are you saying Milo is depressed because of me?" he questioned as he returned his attention to the big brown Lab.

"I don't know," Simon replied as he folded his arms. "Are you depressed?"

He sighed before replying, "It's been a tough time but I'm working on it. I guess I didn't realize that Milo was that empathetic." He rubbed the dog's neck. "What do you recommend I do?"

"Well, pay a little more attention to him, more trips to the park, that kind of stuff. I can't tell you to be happy but I think you'll find as your mental health improves so will Milo's."

"Okay, I got it," he replied, adding under his breath, "I just wish it really was as easy as that."

"What?" Simon asked.

"Nothing," he replied as he latched Milo's collar to the leash and headed to the door.

Simon could see that Martin wasn't willing to pursue the discussion any further so he followed them out to the reception desk. "Goodbye, Martin. I hope things get better for the both of you." He reached over and patted Milo's head. "Bye, Milo. Cheer up, buddy."

"Thank you, Simon." The two men shook hands. After Simon went back into the exam room, he looked down at Milo and felt a wave of guilt. The dog looked up at him and Martin said, "I promise to work on being happy if you do."

Milo barked and he took that as an official verbal agreement.

Happiness here we come.


	2. Chapter 2

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_"Happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response." - Mildred Barthel_

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Chapter 2

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After Jack had finished assigning duties to the team, Sam picked up the file to start her background search and stole a quick look at Martin. He had not been himself since Ruby died. Everyday she held out hope that he would return to the Martin she knew before but so far no luck. He just drew further and further into himself.

There hadn't been one dimple sighting in months.

Remembering her promise to Viv she walked over to where he stood. He was putting on his jacket and getting ready to head out with Danny to interview a possible witness. She caught his eye and said, "Hey."

With a serious expression on his face he replied, "Hi, what's up?"

"I was just wondering if you were going to Viv's tonight," she asked.

Viv had invited the whole team over for dinner claiming she missed the old team but also because she really wanted to talk to Martin. He had been avoiding her for the last two months and on the few occasions that he did see her, he did everything he could to not be alone in the same room with her. He would make brief, awkward conversation and look for any excuse to be somewhere else. Viv told Sam that she hoped if she invited everyone over them maybe Martin might be inclined to attend and she could talk to him.

"Yeah, I'm going," he said with the enthusiasm of someone on their way to get a root canal.

"Good." Sam tilted her head and gave him a small smile.

"Hey, man, you ready to go?" Danny asked from his desk. He already had his jacket on and started moving towards the elevator.

"I better get going," he said as he turned to grab a file from his desk. "See you tonight."

"Yeah, okay, bye," she replied as she watched him leave.

She wondered if the Martin with the easy smile and bright blue eyes would ever return because she missed him.

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Martin clicked off the blinker as soon as he passed the car on the highway. He shifted in his seat to get a little more comfortable and looked over at Danny who was staring out the window. He knew Danny wanted to say something because he kept glancing at him and opening his mouth to speak before he promptly shut it and returned his gaze out the window.

"Just say whatever it is you have to say already," Martin insisted. "You're making me crazy."

Danny bit his lip and then began, "I, uh, would you be my best man?"

"That's what you had to ask me? I thought you were going to spill some deep dark secret or something," he said sounding both frustrated and relieved.

"Why would you think that?" Danny asked, genuinely confused.

"I don't know; you were all twitchy and nervous. I didn't know what to think."

"Well, I just felt strange asking you, considering all that happened," he replied softly as he stared at the highway straight ahead.

Martin turned his focus back to the road and tightened his grip on the steering wheel. He hated that he was the guy who made everyone around him feel uncomfortable. But he also knew that he hadn't exactly been making it easy. He avoided talking about Ruby or anything else that was remotely personal. After his big sob fest with Danny he returned to that classic Fitzgerald method of dealing with grief by pretending it never happened.

However, he also made a deal with his dog to start working on being happy and everyone knows that any human/canine pacts are sacred. He shook his head and said, "I know you and Emma are getting married and I'm happy for you. I don't want you holding back on stuff because you think I can't handle it."

"Fine, I won't," Danny replied.

He wasn't sure if his friend meant it or just said that to placate him. "I'm serious, Danny. Just treat me the way you always have. I'm sorry I've made you feel uncomfortable but I am working on it, okay."

He spotted their exit up ahead so he clicked on his blinker and moved the car towards the off ramp.

Danny turned to look at him and asked, "What are you doing?"

"What? This is our exit," he explained as he slowed the car down.

"You said you were working on it and I was wondering what you were doing."

"Oh," Martin said, not expecting Danny to ask such a personal question. Considering all they have been through together it wasn't out of line either. "I made an appointment to start seeing Lisa again."

Danny smiled and turned to look out the windshield again. "That's good. That's really good."

Martin just nodded his head and slowed to a stop behind a large truck. He looked at the bumper sticker that read 'SHIT HAPPENS.' He had always thought that to be a crude statement for a bumper sticker but considering all he had been through over the last few years it seemed incredibly apt.

He was still focused on the truck's bumper when Danny cleared his throat and said, "You still haven't answered my question."

"What? Oh, yeah, of course I'll be your best man," he replied. A little later added, "So, how many strippers do you want at your bachelor party?"

Danny just looked at him in shock before he started laughing. He looked so amused that it almost made Martin laugh, too.

Almost.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

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"You're here because your dog is depressed?" Lisa asked with an incredulous look on her face.

"No, I'm here because I'm having a hard time dealing with things," Martin replied before explaining. "Milo being depressed is a side effect – at least according to the vet."

"Well, either way I am glad that you have decided to come back and see me." Lisa crossed her legs and leaned forward. "What sorts of 'things' are you dealing with?"

He looked at Lisa with a slightly annoyed expression. He knew that she knew about Ruby's death and she was just doing that therapeutic dance of making the patient say aloud why they were here.

"Ruby's death." Martin felt a wave of guilt whenever he said her name.

She nodded her head solemnly and said, "Tell me about Ruby."

"She was wonderful. She was pretty – beautiful actually. She was funny and smart and honest – sometimes brutally so. She was stubborn and she loved dogs and kids..." He could feel himself start to choke up so he paused. "She was just really incredible. I miss her."

Lisa sat there for a bit and said, "She sounds pretty special."

"She was," he replied before swallowing up his grief.

"What are you hoping to gain from these sessions?" Lisa asked in her now typical clinically detached tone.

"I need to move on and I don't know how. I try but I just can't seem to and everyone walks on eggshells around me when I just want them to be normal," he said before quickly adding, "I want to feel normal."

Lisa leaned back in her chair looking like she was considering something. "Martin, Ruby died in car accident, correct?" He nodded his head slowly dreading where Lisa might be going with this line of questioning. "And you were with her?" He nodded again. "That is a pretty traumatic thing for anyone to go through. But more so for you; it had been almost a year since your shooting…."

"Why do you keep going back to that?" He interrupted. "We've already been through it all. I don't remember anything about it and when I talked to Danny and he told me what happened it didn't trigger any memories. It just made me feel sorry for him." He knew he was being unreasonably confrontational but he was tired of trying to dredge up memories he didn't even have. "He told me he wished he could forget and after being in that car with Ruby I wish I could forget too!"

"You want to forget it?"

"YES! Do you know what it's like to see someone you love dying and you can't do a damn thing about it? To use your hands to try and stop them from bleeding, wishing they would just open their eyes and say something, anything?" Against his will tears started to well up in his eyes. "To be convinced that they are dead and it's your fault."

"Martin, it was a car accident, it wasn't your fault," Lisa replied, calmly and gently.

"It is. She wanted to drive. We argued because she said she should drive since it was her car and she was the one who picked me up. But I insisted and snatched the keys from her. I told her to stop being so hard headed and just let me take care of her." The anger slowly dissipated from his voice and replaced by one filled with guilt. And then he finally said what he could never bring himself to do before, "I should have been in that passenger seat. I should have been the one to get hit in the head by the goddamn parking meter. Ruby wasn't supposed to die, not her, and not our baby.

Thick tears filled his eyes as he finished, "It should have been me."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

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Viv stood at the sink rinsing the carrots and tomatoes for the salad while Sam sat at the counter tearing up the lettuce. She could hear Marcus, Danny and Jack discussing the finer points of barbeque grilling out on the patio while Emma sat in the living room chatting with Nadine, Jack's date. She had invited Paul but he was on vacation, visiting his family back in Baltimore. The only one visibly absent was Martin but Viv had anticipated that he would be the last to arrive and most likely the first to leave.

"Alright, I'm all done. What do you want me to do next?" Sam asked as she pushed the salad bowl closer to where Viv had been sitting so she could add the carrots and tomatoes.

"That's it. Just sit there and drink some wine," Viv replied as she joined her at the counter. "Tell me what's going on, how are things?"

"Work is busy as usual…" she began when Viv held up her hand to stop her.

"I meant, how are things in your life? Are you seeing anyone?" she asked as she started slicing the tomatoes. She knew that Sam had broken up with Seth shortly after the incident with Eleanor but refused to talk about the reason why. Viv had suspected it had to do with Martin getting engaged but she would never dare ask.

Sam took a long drink of her wine before replying, "No, not really. A few dates here and there but no one worth mentioning."

Viv picked up the cutting board and used the knife to slide the tomatoes into the salad bowl. "Well, you just have to give it time I guess."

"Yeah, I guess. How about you? You're looking a lot better," Sam blurted before quickly adding, "I mean; you look really great."

Viv smiled and thought that this was this was the first time she actually felt really good. The day after the procedure when Marcus told her that it was Ruby's heart that she received she became almost inconsolable. She felt so guilty that she was alive because she now had the heart of someone she knew. Someone who was loved by someone she loved. Adding to her despair was the knowledge that it wasn't just one life that was lost but two.

After she found out, she told Marcus that she needed to see Martin but he told her that he was already on his way back to Washington with Danny. She would have to wait until he came back to New York. However, when he had returned he visited her twice and both times he made sure there were other people in the room. When she would try and talk to him alone he would deflect and dodge anything remotely related to whose heart beat in her chest. He could barely look her in the eyes. She wanted him to know how incredibly thankful she was to have Ruby's heart and that while she didn't know her very well she did know she had to of had a generous and loving heart to have had Martin's love.

"I'm feeling good," Viv finally replied as she finished cutting the veggies.

The doorbell rang and Emma shouted, "I'll get it."

Sam looked at Viv and said, "Well, he's here." She reached over and held Viv's hand. "Good luck trying to talk to him. I hope you can get through because we all miss the old Martin."

Viv nodded her head as she and Sam headed into the living room. She didn't want to disappoint Sam by telling her that the old Martin was gone for good.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

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As plates of food were passed around the table everyone was talking and joking around. Danny couldn't help but notice that Martin's eyes were a little puffy but he knew him well enough to ignore it. Besides, he really was making an effort by chatting with Marcus and Jack about baseball.

"So, Emma, you never finished telling me how Danny proposed," Nadine commented as she de-skewered her chicken kabob.

"Oh, yeah," Emma smiled over at Danny as she quickly glanced at Martin. He had told her what Martin had said about treating him like they used to so she replied, "It's actually a pretty funny story."

"Hey, hey, it would have been incredibly romantic if it worked the way I intended," Danny argued as he scooped up some pasta salad.

"Actually it's more romantic that it didn't work out the way you intended," Emma replied with a smirk before returning her attention to Nadine. "To celebrate our anniversary we took a trip to Hawaii – Oahu to be specific – and Danny was trying to think of a way to propose. So he decided he would do it while we were on a snorkeling trip."

"We went on one of those dives where you can see those giant sea turtles," Danny elaborated looking at Nadine. His arms spread wide for visual emphasis on just how big those turtles are.

"Right," Emma agreed as she tried to continue telling the story. "So he decided to try and be creative…"

"It was creative," he insisted.

She worked her tongue into her check and said, "Would you like to tell the story?"

"Yes," he promptly replied. "So we dived below…"

"Are you sure you guys aren't already married?" Marcus joked. Viv gave her husband what could only be described as the evil eye before they both laughed.

Danny ignored them and continued telling the story in spite of Emma's eye rolling, "So we dived below…."

XXX

_He had never seen anything so amazing or beautiful. The water was as blue as the summer sky and you could see everything so clearly. The fish swimming around were bright canary yellow and the reefs below were fascinating, like a bustling underwater metropolis. Some fish swam right up to them while others darted and hid whenever a human came close. He knew that this was definitely the most amazing place he could propose so he swam to the nearest reef and spotted a large rock. When Emma was looking in another direction he took the ring box out of the pocket of his swim trunks and placed it on top of the rock. He then grabbed Emma's arm to get her attention and indicated that he wanted to show her something. _

_When Emma saw the ring box she looked completely stunned. She brought her hands to her face and looked at Danny nervously. However, when he turned to pick the box up the rock started to swim away. He'd put the ring box on the back of a sleeping turtle! _

_He panicked and took off after the turtle but – have you ever chased a sea turtle? They are fast. Emma joined him in the pursuit of the hard shelled jewel thief when the rest of the divers noticed that something was going on. They all joined the couple as they swam after the turtle. Unfortunately, a gang of people wearing goggles frightened the turtle and he started swimming upward causing the ring box to slip off of his back. The box quickly started to sink to the ocean floor. Danny did a quick dive and tired to grab it but it slipped out of his grasp. Fortunately one of the kids from their group had quicker reflexes and managed to reach the box and grab it. He swam back to Danny and handed it to him. Danny turned to look at Emma who, using her thumb, indicated that they should go back above water. _

"_Man that was close!" he said as he removed his snorkeling mask. "I thought I'd lost it for sure." _

_Emma just looked at him not saying a word. _

"_What?" he asked wondering if she was mad that he almost lost her ring._

_The mother of the kid who rescued the ring yelled out, "You still have to propose you idiot!" _

"_Right," he said as Emma laughed and continued looking at him expectantly. "Thank you!" He shouted back to the woman who was now joined by the rest of the group in watching the two of them. _

_Danny popped open the box and looked up at Emma to see she had tears in her eyes. He suddenly found himself getting choked up too. He blew out a breath to steady his nerves and said, "Will you marry me?" _

"_Yes!" Emma tossed her arms around him and kissed him hard on the mouth as the tour group cheered. She pulled back and Danny opened up the box and slid the ring on her finger. _

XXX

"I think that is a romantic story," Nadine commented dreamily.

"Thank you, Nadine," Danny replied, looking pointedly at Emma who just shook her head bemusedly.

"Martin, maybe you should take notes so when you're ready to pop the question you can be sure to rule out the underwater sea turtle proposal," Nadine casually joked.

The table became very quiet for a few beats as everyone pretended to not look at Martin while actually stealing glances to gauge his reaction. Martin just stared nodded his head and stared at his empty wine glass.

Thankfully, Marcus quickly spoke up and said, "Hey, who wants dessert? We have chocolate cake."

Murmurs of 'yum' and 'that sounds great' went around the table when Viv stood up and said, "Marcus sit down, I'll get the cake. Martin, can you help me please?"

Martin looked like he was being called on by the teacher but he stood up and followed Viv into the kitchen. As soon as they were out of ear shot, Nadine turned to Jack and asked, "What did I say?"

Concerned looks went around the table as Jack began to explain the complicated tale of Martin, Ruby and Viv. Danny wondered how Martin and Viv were doing alone in the kitchen when he glanced over at Sam who was focused on the door looking as worried as he felt.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

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Martin felt all his nerves constrict as he entered the kitchen. He knew that he would have to sit and talk alone with Viv eventually but whenever he thought about it he would be on the verge of an anxiety attack. He didn't know why he agreed to help her with dessert knowing that they would be alone together. Maybe he was still exhausted from his session with Lisa or maybe it was the four glasses of wine he had during dinner.

Or maybe he just wanted to get away from that table and the pitying looks of his friends.

"What do you think? Should we make coffee?" Viv asked trying to sound casual.

"Seems like a good idea."

Viv smiled and pulled the carafe out of the Mr. Coffee. "Can you grab that tray and the coffee mugs? They're in the cabinet behind you."

Martin nodded and did as he was told. He opened the cabinet door to retrieve the mugs while Viv filled the carafe with water. As he placed some mugs on the counter he could feel her eyes on him but he couldn't bring himself to turn and look at her.

"I guess you know I had an ulterior motive for inviting you over tonight," she quietly said as she poured the water into the coffee maker.

"I kind of figured. Sam has been hounding me all week about whether I not I was coming tonight." He paused and finally looked over at her deciding to confess. "I almost didn't come – I planned out my excuse and even picked up the phone to call you."

She picked up a glass jar container off a counter and began to spoon coffee grounds into the machine. "What excuse were you going to use?"

"My dog is sick and has a horrible case of diarrhea." Viv stopped mid-scoop to see if he was serious and he gave her a sheepish smile.

"That's good," she replied with raised her eyebrows as she poured in the final scoop. "It's hard to disprove and the diarrhea pretty much guarantees no one is going to ask too many questions. Nice." She shut the lid on the coffee container and put it back in line with the other ones on the counter.

"I thought so," he replied before returning his attention back to the coffee mugs.

"I'm sorry for planning it this way. I hated doing it but I really needed to talk and you wouldn't return my calls or agree to meet me." Viv walked over and stood where the hot pink cake box sat on the counter but made no move to open it. "I just need to know that we can still be friends, Martin. That you don't hate me or blame me."

He held a mug in his hand and stared at it with his back to Viv. He swallowed the lump in his throat and softly responded, "I don't hate you or blame you. I could never….its just, when I see you I am so grateful that you are alive but at the same time I am reminded of Ruby and that night. It just hurts." He turned around to face her and added, "I know that you were struggling with organ donation to begin with……I didn't want to make you feel worse than I already knew you were feeling."

Viv nodded her head and looked over at the coffee machine. It was percolating and tiny brown drips of coffee slowly began filling up the carafe. "Martin, I appreciate you trying to protect me but it hurt more to not be able to talk to you." Tears started to fall and she wiped them away with both hands. "I needed you to know how incredibly thankful I am that you thought of me during what was certainly one of the darkest, saddest moments of your life. To tell you how grateful and honored I am to have Ruby's heart."

They both remained silent and the sounds of the gang talking in the living room filtered in, echoing off the walls.

He didn't know how it happened but before he knew it his eyes filled with tears again and his shoulders hitched. He was suddenly embarrassed to be crying in front of her so he turned back around just as Viv walked over. She gently rubbed his shoulder and he knew she wanted him to turn around but he wouldn't budge. He just shook his head as he cried when she tugged his arm so he would have to look at her. When he did she hugged him before he had a chance to push her away.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

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Martin and Danny walked into the park to interview, Slim Hopper, a friend of a locksmith who had disappeared. According to the missing man's wife, the locksmith owed Slim quite a bit of money so Jack sent the boys to look into it.

"Do you know what 'fondant' is?" Danny asked as they made their way past the playground where kids were screaming and shouting and running around like packs of wild dogs.

It had been a few weeks since the dinner party at Viv's and Martin's disposition was improving everyday. The sessions with Lisa were a big help and he finally felt like he was making some progress in dealing with personal things in his life. Apparently it was showing because Danny was asking him more and more questions about wedding stuff since Martin had told him he had been involved in eighteen weddings in one capacity or another: from ring bearer to best man; always a groomsman, never a groom.

He smiled and explained, "It's a sugary creamy white frosting that is solid and you use it for cakes. Why?"

"Emma asked me if I preferred butter cream frosting or fondant for the wedding cake. I had no idea what she was talking about," Danny replied and then pointed to the open area where the local men of the neighborhood played spirited games of chess.

"How did you answer?"

"I told her I trusted her judgment." Danny shrugged before pointing towards two men playing chess. "I think that's our guy."

Sitting on a bench sat Slim Hopper. Although, the name 'Slim' was a misnomer because he was a large heavy-set man of about 380 pounds with thin black hair that was slicked back and wore large black framed glasses.

As Danny and Martin rounded the corner Slim spotted them and took off running. Well, sort of. It was actually more of a fast paced waddle. He restrained a laugh and asked Danny, "Is he really trying to run away from us?"

"Yeah, I think so," Danny said as he watched Slim make an ambitious, albeit slow, escape. "So, who gets to chase him?"

"Rock, paper, scissors?"

Danny nodded and the two men shook their fists. Martin's rock beat out Danny's scissors and he went off in pursuit of Slim.

Martin walked behind and watched as Danny caught up with their rotund runner who raised his hands quickly over his head in surrender. He said something to Slim who lowered his hands but at that exact moment the sidewalk under them gave way and they disappeared below. Martin took off at high speed and came to a halt at the hole to find that Danny and Slim had fallen down an old elevator shaft.

He looked down and could see Danny crushed underneath Slim's enormous weight.

"ARE YOU OKAY?" he shouted, incredibly worried for his friend. He studied to see if either of them were moving and contemplated on whether or not he should jump down into the shaft when Danny opened his eyes and gave him the 'thumbs up' signal indicating that he was alright.

Slim groaned loudly before losing consciousness – while still on top of Danny who tried to shove him off but it was no good. He looked up at Martin and as loudly as he could with a 380 pound man on his chest he gasped, "Help."

"I'm coming down," Martin replied stifling a laugh at the sight before him. He glanced around looking for an entrance when he spotted one in a basement area. He started to walk towards it when he stopped and turned back. He looked at Danny who was lying under Slim with closed eyes.

A quick flash of light lit up the basement before it went dark again.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

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"So I get beeped that there is a very cute FBI agent waiting for me in the ER," Emma announced as she entered the exam room. Danny sat on the gurney with his shirt off while Martin slouched in a chair alongside him looking very amused.

"Hey," he replied as he rubbed his ribs. They were aching and he thought maybe he had broken one or two of them. They had already taken x-rays and asked them to wait until a doctor could see them.

Emma stood in front of Danny and started examining him. "So what happened?" She found a really tender part of his ribs and he winced. "That hurt?"

"When you press it like that it does," he replied through gritted teeth.

"I'm guessing that you have a couple of broken ribs but I'll wait for the x-rays to come back to be sure." She pulled out her stethoscope and asked him to take some deep breaths. When she was done she hung the stethoscope around her neck and said, "Your breathing sounds really good. So are you going to tell me what happened or not?"

"I was pursuing a suspect and….." he paused and wondered if he really wanted to tell her the truth about what happened. No, he did not. So he opted for vague and said, "Let's just say he and I fell into a situation."

Emma stopped what she was doing and looked at him suspiciously. With her eyes still on him she asked, "Martin, what happened?"

"He fell into a shaft and a fat man fell on top of him." Martin said happily. He was smiling so widely that Danny glared back at him.

Her lips twitched in a grin and with laughter in her voice said, "Um, okay. Danny, did anything unusual happen after the fall? Any specific pain…" Then using her pen light she started checking his pupils for signs of a concussion.

Hoping that his fiancée would become sympathetic and stop laughing at him he said, "I could have sworn that when my eyes were closed there was a flash of light."

"Oh, that was probably my cell phone camera," Martin interjected. He stood up and showed Emma a picture of Danny lying with his arms and legs stretched as a large man in checkered golf pants lay on top of him.

She gasped as she looked at the picture and said, "Oh my God, Danny, you could've been killed."

Ignoring her, he looked at Martin in disbelief and asked, "You took a picture?"

"Yeah, you know for evidence." He laughed completely unashamed. "And I'm thinking of using it as my desktop image."

"You jerk!" If his chest didn't hurt so badly he would have leapt off of the gurney.

Martin was still laughing when a nurse knocked on the door and said, "Dr. Close, here are the x-rays."

Emma walked to the doorway, thanked the nurse and took the film and put it under the light. "Well, congratulations, you have two broken ribs."

Danny groaned at the same time that Martin's cell phone rang. "Fitzgerald. Hi, Jack. Yeah, he has two broken ribs….." As he talked to he walked over to the other side of the room giving him and Emma a little space.

"Well, I hope that you were able to get some valuable information from the suspect," she commented as she pulled out her doctor's RX pad and sat down to write out a prescription for the pain.

"Actually, no. He hadn't seen the locksmith in weeks and the only reason he ran was because he thought we were after him for his recreational marijuana use." Danny grimaced as he pulled his shirt back on. "I have two broken ribs and it was all for nothing."

"I wouldn't say that," she replied.

"What do you mean?" he asked as he began buttoning up.

She tilted her head towards where Martin was talking on the phone and said, "I haven't seen him laugh that hard or look that happy in a long time."

He looked over to see Martin laughing on the phone and had to agree.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

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Sam wandered into the break room wanting to grab a little snack to tide her over until she could get some real dinner. She had been chasing leads all day and managed to miss lunch. When she walked in she spotted Martin sitting at a table in the corner. He was surrounded by paperwork and there was an open a take-out carton on the table. He looked up when she entered and smiled – dimples and all.

"Hey, how'd it go at the bar?" he asked as he took a sip of his soda.

"Well, the bartender said he remembers him coming in but that he left in a hurry." She walked over and sat down next to him, eyeing his food. It was BBQ ribs and steak fries. She felt her mouth water. "He said that he looked desperate but didn't know why."

He must have noticed her attention to his food because he slid the carton of ribs over to her and said, "Want to share my dinner? I ordered too much."

She was certain that it was not the truth but she was too hungry to decline. She picked up a rib and said, "I guess I can help you out this once." As she took her first bite she nodded to the food and asked, "Ribs? A little subliminal influence from Danny's incident?"

"You could say that." Martin grinned at her before getting back to work. "I went through our MP's cell phone records and most of the calls are one shot deals – actual work stuff; people locking themselves out of their apartments and cars." Sam finished the one rib and reached for some fries. She noticed that Martin was watching her amusedly but she didn't care. "Three numbers showed up pretty regularly, the lock shop and his home. That is until a month ago…" He fumbled through the papers looking for something so she decided to take advantage of the opportunity and grabbed another rib. "Here it is: an Eddie Linnell started calling him several times in the last month."

"Do you know who this Eddie person is?" She asked as she examined the rib for any meat she might have missed.

"Um, not yet," he replied with a laugh. "You really were hungry."

"I missed lunch," she replied holding up the sticky, saucy rib with both her hands.

"I can see that. I also see you have sauce on your cheek." Martin smiled pointing to her right cheek before he reached over and used his thumb to wipe it off. When he pulled back he licked the sauce off of his thumb. He did it so casually that she wondered if he even knew how that gesture affected her. When he started talking about the case again she knew he didn't have a clue. "Paul is working on tracking down Eddie and Danny's gone home for the day."

He looked at her expectantly and she knew that he was waiting for her to say something about the case but all she could concentrate on was how gently he touched her face. She missed when they could touch each other so freely. She suddenly lost her appetite and put the last bits of the rib back in the box. She looked at him and quietly replied, "Good. That's good news."

Martin noticed her change in demeanor and asked, "What is it, something wrong?"

Sam forced a smile and replied, "No, just a little heartburn."


	10. Chapter 10

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"_Love is like war, easy to begin but hard to end." - Anonymous _

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Chapter 10

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"Sam, do you need any help?" Emma shouted. She was seated on the floor next to the coffee table poking around the mostly empty white cartons from their Chinese take-out. Danny and Emma had invited Martin and Sam over for dinner to discuss some wedding stuff and it seemed that Emma's mom found a version of the dress she had her own bridesmaid's wear when she married Emma's father and had one sent to help 'persuade' her daughter to use them in her own wedding.

"No, I'm okay!" Sam shouted from the bedroom.

"She's been in there a long time. Does this dress have a lot of zippers or buttons?" Danny asked as he tossed the last pot sticker in his mouth.

"I don't know. I haven't seen it," she replied as she pushed back another carton not having found anything that tempted her.

"Didn't you look at it when it arrived?" Martin asked taking a drink of his beer. He was having a really nice time. He missed hanging out with his friends. He especially missed having a comfortable friendship with Sam but they were getting back to good again. He really was feeling better everyday.

"No, I didn't want to judge it until I saw it on an actual body," she replied as she leaned back and looked down the hall. "Sam?"

"Hang on, I'm coming," Sam replied as they heard the bedroom door creak open. He knew that tone of her voice and she was not happy. They heard fabric swooshing down the hall and Danny and Martin leaned forward on the couch in anticipation while Emma turned around on the floor.

Seconds later Sam appeared before them and she looked absolutely – ridiculous.

The dress was hot pink and in classic Victorian style; complete with a high collar, cinched waist, large billowing skirt and yards of white lace trim. To make matters worse it was at least two sizes two large on Sam so it drooped everywhere. It was quite possibly the most god awful dress Martin had seen in his life and when he looked at Sam's face she looked absolutely miserable that she even had to put it on.

He leaned back on the sofa and put his hand on his mouth to try and keep from laughing at her.

"Well?" Sam asked as she stood there waiting for Emma's reaction; after all, as the bride it was ultimately her decision.

Emma just sat there gaping when Danny blurted out, "That is the ugliest dress I've ever seen!"

Emma turned around and shot a look at Danny before grinning and agreeing, "It is!" She turned back to look at Sam and apologized, "I am so sorry! I can't believe you even put it on."

Sam looked visibly relieved and said, "Thank god! I thought I was going to have to break my leg or something so I could get out of having to wear this to the wedding."

"I think I should have my mom checked out. She had to have had a stroke to even think I would like that dress," Emma said laughingly.

"Maybe she was just trying to make sure you were the best looking woman at the wedding," Sam offered with a relieved grin. "Now if you'll excuse me I am going to get out of this circus tent." She bunched up the skirt and turned to head back when Martin called her name. She turned around to see what he wanted and he held up his cell phone.

-click-

Martin and Danny both started laughing that there was now digital documentation of Sam in that dress when she got a murderous look on her face and marched straight towards him. Danny moved as far away from him as he could, so Martin jumped behind the sofa to use it as a divider between Sam and him.

"Give me that phone right now!" she demanded.

"No way!" he replied laughingly as he dodged left when she moved right.

"If you don't give me that phone or delete that picture I will….I will…," she stammered in her rage. "Damn it, give me that phone!"

He stopped, smiled, shook his head and simply said, "No."

She looked over at Danny and said, "If you help me, we can delete that photo of you and Slim."

Danny looked back at her as he considered her so Martin decided to counter offer. "If you don't help her I will delete that photo myself."

She turned and glared at him. "Don't listen to him Danny. He's bluffing."

Martin shook his head and held up the cell phone. "Oh, I'm serious. I've got a new favorite photo." He grinned back at her and waggled his eyebrows.

Sam shot him a look of pure venom and yelled, "Give me that phone Martin Fitzgerald!"

She chased him around the sofa when he heard Emma tell Danny, "That's it, no more alcohol for them."

"I'll go make coffee," Danny replied as he and Emma headed into the kitchen.

It was then that he realized his mistake. He was so distracted by watching what Emma and Danny were doing that Sam took advantage and jumped on and over the sofa diving right onto him, knocking them both to the floor.

"Give it!" she ordered as she lay on top of Martin.

"Never!" he replied with his arm stretched out just enough to keep the phone from Sam's reach. He was laughing so hard he was afraid he almost couldn't breathe.

As she struggled to grab the camera phone from his hand he couldn't help but notice how beautiful she looked when she was angry, flushed, and breathless. Unfortunately, that thought brought back the memories of the last time he saw her looking like this and it sent a jolt of arousal through his body. Immediately he knew he was in a dangerous position and he needed to get out of from under her – FAST.

"Okay, uncle! I give," he shouted as he handed her the phone. "Here."

Sam looked at him curiously, probably wondering why he gave up so easily but she accepted it and rolled off of him. "Thanks." She sat up and headed back to the bedroom to change back into her own clothes. As she walked away she said, "I'm holding onto this until we leave. Clearly you cannot be trusted with it."

"Okay," he replied meekly as he mentally willed his body to calm down. He kept telling himself: _She's just your friend. She's just your friend…_


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

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It was a beautiful Sunday morning so Martin decided to take Milo for a run through Central Park. He had just reached the North Meadow when he heard someone shout his name. He stopped and turned around spotting Viv walking in his direction. She was dressed all in black and carrying a backpack.

"Hey, good morning," he said as he walked towards her with a big smile on his face.

"Morning," Viv said as she neared. She looked healthy and happy.

"What are you doing here?" He glanced around for any signs of Marcus or Reggie.

"Waiting for Sam, we do yoga in the park sometimes," she explained before asking, "Is this Milo?"

"Oh, right, you haven't met. Shake Milo," he said and the big Lab lifted up his right paw and Viv shook it.

Viv smiled and said, "He's cute."

"Sorry I'm late," Sam said as she approached from behind Martin. "Hey." She looked down and said, "Hi, are you Milo?"

Milo was wagging his tail so enthusiastically at the sight of Sam that he was literally pounding it into Martin's knees. Without being told, he sat down on his haunches and lifted up his paw.

"Oh, he's smart." She reached down and shook his paw, smiling broadly. She scratched him behind the ears and moved closer to her, practically begging her to never, ever stop.

Martin could relate to that feeling.

Viv looked at Sam and said, "We should go find a spot before it gets too crowded." Then she turned to Martin and said, "You should join us. Yoga stretches are good for runners."

"Thanks for asking but it's not really my thing," he replied shaking his head.

"Don't bother Viv, I've tried to get him to do yoga but he thinks it for 'chicks'." Sam rolled her eyes and smirked at Martin.

"I'm pretty sure I did not use the word 'chicks'," he denied, grinning directly into her face; enjoying their playful banter.

"Whatever, he thinks it's only for girls." She continued smiling right back.

"Well, it's just as well; it might be too difficult for him to do anyway," Viv said dismissively.

"Yeah, you're right," Sam agreed. She motioned to Martin and said, "Can you imagine this guy doing a Cobra or a Boat?"

"I know what you're doing and it's not going to work," he said shaking his head. He could not believe that they were trying to bait him.

"What are we doing? We're agreeing with you," Viv argued but the smirk was unmistakable. "Yoga is easier for women than men."

He lifted his hand up for them to stop with their feeble attempt at reverse psychology and said, "Nice try, but I'm not that gullible."

Later, as Martin moved into a downward dog pose he thought, _I am that gullible. _


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

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Sam looked over at Martin doing yoga and she had to admit he was actually pretty good. She smiled when she realized that she actually she did know he was flexible. She could feel her face blush at the memory. After a few more rounds of sun salutations the class ended. They gathered their things and made their way to a kiosk and Martin bought Viv and Sam a round of waters.

"See, it wasn't that bad," Viv said as she twisted the lid off of her water bottle.

"Actually some of those stretches were pretty similar to ones I do before I run so maybe it isn't just for 'chicks'," Martin replied pointedly to Sam.

"Yeah, and you were pretty good. I mean your downward dog was almost as good as Milo's." Sam gave a light laugh and sipped her water as he stood there looking annoyed.

"Okay, I'm out of here," Viv said as she picked up her backpack. She gave each of them a quick hug and was on her way home.

Sam and Martin stood there looking at one another drinking their water when he finally spoke up, "So what are you doing today?"

"I don't know. Laundry I guess, you?" she replied screwing the plastic cap back on her water.

"The only thing on my agenda was to run so when you factor in the yoga class I've actually done a lot. I just might need a nap," he said as Milo sat down and stared intently at some pigeons.

"Yeah, well, I guess I should get going," she said thumbing in the direction of her apartment although she didn't really want to leave.

"Yeah, okay," he replied as he tugged on Milo's leash to move him along. "See you tomorrow."

"Bye." Sam started walking away when she heard Martin shout her name. She turned around and he was standing by a bench. "Yeah?"

"I was thinking I might go grab something to eat – do you want to come along? It would have to be a patio restaurant, since I have Milo, but…."

"Yeah, I could eat." She walked over to where they stood. "So, do you have a place in mind?"

"Yeah," he replied as they started walking. "There's this small café just around the block. The owner welcomes pets..."

As Martin described the place Sam busied her hands on the water bottle because she had a strong urge to reach over and hold his hand as they walked. She was surprised that she was feeling that way because she was the one who normally avoided being touchy feely in public but here she was walking with Martin in the incredibly public Central Park and all she could think about was how nice it would be to hold his hand as they walked the dog. It was so unlike her and she wondered where those feelings were coming from and what they meant.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

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Martin was in the tech room with James reviewing video footage from the security cameras outside of PS 346, the elementary school were 9-yr old Clayton Tyler disappeared five hours ago. They still weren't sure if it was a kidnapping or if Clayton had just wandered off. No one saw him leave and in New York City it isn't easy to spot someone suspicious on a crowded city street. So Martin and James were the ones who had to go through all the tapes and piece together what might have happened or in what direction they went while the rest of the team searched the area and interviewed anyone who might have seen anything.

They had just put in another video tape when his cell phone rang. Keeping his eyes on the monitor he picked up his cell phone and answered, "Fitzgerald."

"We found Clayton." Danny's voice sounded tired and weary.

"Is he okay?" He looked away from the monitor, turning his gaze downward. Based on Danny's tone he had a feeling the answer would not be good.

"No, he's dead." Danny's voice was tight. "He was playing in an abandoned warehouse and feel through a rotted floor. By the look of it he died instantaneously."

Martin's stomach lurched. It was never easy when they found the missing person dead but it always felt ten times worse when it was a child. "Are they sure it was an accident?"

"Yeah, one of his friends told Paul that they used to come here to play. That's why we searched it," Danny said tightly. "Jack and Sam are on their way to tell the parents."

"Okay," he replied with his eyes still on the floor. "I'll get this stuff all boxed up. Are you on your way back here?"

"Yeah, see you in a few," Danny replied before hanging up.

Martin clicked off his phone and sat up in his chair. He looked up to see dozens of small kids on the monitor. Their cherub faces laughing and smiling as they headed into school.

"I'm guessing we are looking anymore," James said as he pushed his keyboard back.

"No," he replied, shaking his head. "They found him."

James knew by the morose tone of his voice what he meant so he ejected the video tapes and started putting them back in the box. As soon as all of the tapes were packed Martin picked up the box and headed back to the bullpen.

He put the box on the conference table and walked over to the board to take down Clayton's photo. He looked at the picture and saw a young boy smiling back at him. It never failed to break his heart to know that another life was cut tragically short. That this beautiful little boy with big brown eyes and two missing front teeth was gone forever.

As he studied the photo he started thinking about Ruby and the baby. He had told Lisa in one session that he felt guilty for not feeling bad all the time. That now when he thought of them, the memory didn't suffocate him; it didn't hurt as badly anymore. She said that it didn't mean he loved them any less it just meant the he had come to terms with the fact that they were gone. He was letting go and moving on.

Maybe so but now he was stuck trying to figure out how to move forward.


	14. Chapter 14

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"_Love is like a friendship caught on fire." - Bruce Lee_

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Chapter 14

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Sam kicked the sheets with her feet trying to find a comfortable position. She had been trying to fall asleep for the last forty minutes but finding no luck. She couldn't get the case out of her head. She hated having to give bad news to parents, their distraught cries echoing in her mind. She had no idea how they could go on after literally losing a piece of themselves. It was heartbreaking.

She rolled over to look at the clock on her nightstand. Its bright red lights read: 12:35 AM.

She sighed heavily, gave up any pretense of sleeping and got up out of bed. She decided that if she couldn't sleep she might as well do something productive like balance her check book. She wandered over to the desk in the living room and pressed the button that brought her PC to life.

As she was working her way through her ledger the little MSN Instant Messenger icon popped up to let her know that 'sportsnut' was online. Sam smiled and clicked the box to send a message.

Firefly: Couldn't sleep either?

SportsNut: No. Chkbook balanced? ;-)

Firefly: LOL. Bidding? ;-P

When they were dating she found out that Martin was always bidding on some sort of sports memorabilia on eBay. She didn't want to think about how much money he spent on old baseballs, jerseys and autographed baseball cards.

SportsNut: Yes, smarty pants.

Firefly: What R U bidding 4?

SportsNut: bball signed by 86 Mets

Firefly: how much?

SportsNut: u don't want 2 know - brb

Instead of sitting there waiting for him to return, she hurried to her bathroom to grab some nail polish. Since she was done with her banking she might as well do something that she enjoyed and could still be considered productive. When she returned she saw that Martin still had not replied so she decided to just pick up the phone and call. After all, friends call friends. Even at one o'clock in the morning.

"I wasn't gone that long," Martin answered laughing.

"I got bored." She moved to sit on the sofa and put one foot on the edge of the coffee table. She cradled the phone between her shoulder and chin as she unscrewed the nail polish bottle. "What are you doing now?"

"Some guy who goes by the handle 'Mets Man' is trying to out bid me," he replied and Sam could hear his nimble fingers typing away. "I needed to up my limit."

"I can't believe you are having a bidding war for a baseball at one in the morning." Sam laughed as she painted her big toe nail pink.

"Well, it's not like I can give myself a midnight pedicure," he replied.

Sam looked down at the nail polish she held in her hand and her now pink painted toe nail. It threw her for loop whenever she realized just how well Martin knew her; it was simultaneously disconcerting and comforting. She cleared her throat and retaliated, "Ahem, actually if I recall you enjoy a midnight pedicure."

"Hey, I thought we agreed to never speak about that again." He tried to sound serious but she could hear the laughter in his voice. When they were still in the wooing stage of their relationship she managed to convince Martin to let her paint his toenails. It was under the guise of showing him how good it felt to pamper oneself. It took a whole lot of arm twisting, promises of clear polish only and a sworn oath that she would never, ever tell anyone.

She heard the unmistakable sound of a computer being shut down. "No more bidding?"

"Nah, I'll lull 'Mets Man' into a false sense of security and then bid high tomorrow morning," he replied sleepily.

She frowned; she was enjoying their late night conversation and didn't want it to end. Then she suddenly heard the sound of people talking in the background and smiled knowing that he had turned on the TV. "What are you watching?"

"There's an _X-Files_ marathon on the Sci-Fi network," he replied. His voice got muffled for a moment and she mentally pictured him lying down on his sofa.

"I still can't believe how much you like science fiction stuff," she commented even as she clicked on her own TV and flipped the channel to watch along with him.

"Hey, I think I've already proven that this knowledge can be helpful in an investigation. Think of it as research." His voice was filled with humor.

"Point taken," she said as she finished her nails and put the cap back on the polish. "So why are they at a high school reunion?"

"The guy with the glasses can control the weather with his emotions. It's been raining because he is depressed. He has been in love with the blonde since high school but never told her how he felt. She just always thought of him as her friend. Mulder and Scully are trying to convince him to tell her and then the rain would let up."

"Okay." Sam smiled and settled into the sofa. They watched the end of the episode and Sam asked, "Have you ever attended a class reunion?"

"I went to my ten-year high school reunion and my fraternity from college has one every five years. It's pretty fun to see how everyone has changed," he said warmly. "What about you? Did you ever go and show off your gun?"

She should have known that Martin would go to his reunions. He was probably popular with lots of friends and had a great time in high school and college.

Sam rested her head on the shoulder of her sofa and replied, "No. I hated high school and I wasn't that involved with extracurricular activities in college so there really isn't a reunion to attend. I used to keep in touch with my old roommate once in awhile but we went off to lead very different lives so we eventually drifted apart."

"What's her name?" he asked softly.

"Jessica Lewis. I found out she works as a loan officer in Chicago and is married with three kids." Sam sighed at remembering how close she and Jessica used to be. She missed having girlfriends that she was close to. She and Viv were good friends but it wasn't quite the same. "It's kind of weird isn't it? To have had a friend that you used to share your deepest, darkest secrets with, the stuff that seemed so monumentally important at the time, and now they are just out there in the world and you don't even know them anymore."

Martin took such a heavy breath that she heard it on her end. "It's like that with almost all relationships that are important to you. It's sad to think you'll never be the same way again. To not know them the way you used to."

She paused a moment and whispered, "Yeah, it is."

He was quiet for a few beats when he added, "But they change, too. Maybe they aren't the same but they can still be good. They can evolve and maybe be even better than they were before."

Sam smiled at the hopefulness in his voice, "Yeah, that's true. They can be better."

A few hours later Sam crawled into bed exhausted. She and Martin stayed on the phone through another episode about an alien who wanted to play baseball and one infomercial about some kind of miracle frying pan that they both decided that while it was fascinating, they could live without.

While she was physically tired her mind was wide awake. She kept thinking about her and Martin's conversation about relationships. They didn't talk directly about themselves but there was something in his voice and what he said that made her wonder if there was a chance for them still.

As she drifted off to sleep she recalled what Scully said to the blonde woman in the high school reunion episode that they watched. Her words had really struck a cord with Sam:

"_Well, it seems to me that the best relationships-- the ones that last-- are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship. You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before; like a switch has been flicked somewhere. And the person who was just a friend is... suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with."_


	15. Chapter 15

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_I think it's getting to the point where I can be myself again.  
It's getting to the point where we have almost made amends.  
I think it's getting to the point that's the hardest part.  
_

'_Call and Answer'- Barenaked Ladies_

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Chapter 15

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Lisa sat in her chair, her right elbow on the arm rest and her chin propped up on her fist. She had asked Martin if there was anything he wanted to discuss and he said there was but he needed a minute to figure out how to say it. So here he sat on the sofa in Lisa's office trying to find the words to say what he had to say.

That was seven…..no, eight minutes ago.

"Martin?" Lisa gently pressed.

"Yeah, I know." He took a deep breath and gathered up the courage to say what he'd been thinking about out loud. "I have been thinking about Sam a lot recently; more than a lot. We've been hanging out and talking – as friends – but my old feelings for her are coming back." Martin paused and ran his hand across his jaw. "Actually, that's a lie. I don't think they ever went away."

"Okay, so how are you dealing with those feelings?"

"Not good." He rubbed the palms of his hands over his thighs and said, "I feel guilty about Ruby…." He choked up and couldn't finish his sentence.

"It's normal to feel some guilt about moving on when someone you loved died."

He shook his head. "That's not it. I feel guilty because…" He looked down at his hands and in a voice almost like a whisper he confessed something that had been gnawing at him for the last two months, "Because while I did love Ruby…I didn't love her enough."

"What do you mean?"

"When she told me she was pregnant and we decided to get married there was a part of me that felt sad." He bit his lip before softly saying, "I mean I was excited that I was going to have a family, it was what I had always wanted. And she was a wonderful person, inside and out. I knew that we would be happy together but it felt strange that it wasn't going to be with Sam. I knew that she didn't want a family or marriage; that's why I broke up with her. But at the same time I guess there was a part of me that still held out hope."

"There is nothing wrong with holding on to hope," Lisa replied.

"There is when you plan a future with someone else." Martin stopped fiddling with his hands and clasped them in front of him. He looked up at Lisa and added, "It wasn't fair to Ruby."

"Martin, you loved Ruby. You may have had still have had feelings for Sam but that doesn't negate what you felt for her," Lisa said in a gentle voice that bordered on motherly.

He tilted his head to indicate that he was listening but he didn't quite agree. "I don't know."

"I think you should write a letter," Lisa said authoritatively as Martin eyed her skeptically. "You heard me. I think you should write a letter to Ruby – tell her about these things that you are feeling; how you felt about her, about the baby, and about Sam."

"You want me to write to Ruby about Sam?" he asked in disbelief.

"Yes."

"Are you going to read it?" he asked as he considered the idea.

Lisa shifted in her seat and leaned forward. "Only if you want me to, if not you can burn it, shred it, or keep it. I just want you to commit something to paper."

He nodded his head in agreement. However, he couldn't help but think that it was going to be the hardest thing he would ever have to write.


	16. Chapter 16

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_It's a new dawn  
It's a new day  
It's a new life  
For me  
And I'm feeling good_

'_Feeling Good' - Nina Simone_

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Chapter 16

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Danny yawned and sat back in his chair. He glanced over at Sam who was sitting across from him at the conference table looking as bored as he felt. There was no new case so Jack told them to use the time to catch up on their case reports. Martin and Paul were sitting at their desks playing solitaire; a pair of pain-in-the-asses who always seemed to get their reports done quickly and on time.

"I am soooo bored," Danny groaned out loud to anyone who might listen.

"Me too, I really wish I hadn't procrastinated on some of these reports," Sam replied as she caught Martin turning around to say something she quickly told him. "Not a word."

He just grinned at her before getting up to join them at the table.

"If you guys have anything I can do I'd be happy to help," Paul offered. Danny knew he was still feeling like the new kid in the group and was in the honeymoon stage of trying to be helpful and pleasant.

"Well, since you're offering…" Danny began when a familiar voice interrupted.

"Don't do it, Paul," Vivian said in a warning tone as she strode into the bullpen. "You do it once and suddenly Danny's your new best friend who could use 'a little favor' a lot."

"That hurts, Viv," Danny replied as he stood up to give her a big hug.

Everyone joined in on the greetings and when they were done they all sat down at the conference table.

"So, what brings you here?" Sam asked as she shoved some reports aside so they wouldn't be in Viv's way.

"I was in the neighborhood and I had to talk to Jack so I thought I'd stop by and see what you guys were up to." Viv glanced at the stacks of files and said, "By the looks of it, nothing much going on right now."

"Case report day," Sam muttered before asking, "What do you have to see Jack about?"

"I went with Marcus to a faculty party a few nights ago and the chair of the sociology department asked if I would like to teach some undergrad courses in criminology and deviance and social control." Vivian smiled and a genuine look of optimism was on her face. "I need to get Jack to give me a letter of recommendation."

"That is so great, Viv," Martin replied with a big smile. "Or should I say, Professor Johnson?"

She laughed.

"It really is good news. When would you start?" Danny asked from where he sat. It was good to hear that she might be going back to work but that she was also feeling strong enough to be able to.

"In the spring, it's just the two courses but it would get me out of the house," she said as she leaned back in her chair. "I miss working."

Danny saw Jack heading out the door of his office and shouted, "Jack!" to stop him from leaving early and missing Viv.

Jack turned around and headed to the bullpen, smiling when he saw Viv.

"Hi, what are you doing here?" he asked as he gave Viv hug. She repeated what she had told them earlier and Jack replied, "Of course I'd write a letter of recommendation for you. When do you need it by?"

"Monday?"

"Great, I can do that. Listen, it was great to see you but I have to go….I'll get that letter for you by Monday," Jack said as he moved to leave.

"What's your rush? Got a hot date?" Danny deadpanned.

Jack didn't say anything he just gave a sly smile and winked. The team all looked at one another before breaking out into hoots and hollers. 'Way to go Jack!' 'Don't do anything I wouldn't do!'

Danny watched Jack's retreating form and mentally wished him luck. Jack was trying but after the failed attempt with Nadine this was the first date they all knew about. If anyone could use a little love in his life it was him. He glanced at Martin and thought that he had plenty of love in his life he just needed to reach out and grab her.

"Since the boss is already gone and it's almost five anyway, what do you say we all go out for a little happy hour?" Viv asked as she glanced around the table.

"You're on," Martin replied as he headed to his desk to shut down his computer.

"I'd like that, I could use some more dirt on these guys," Paul said as he headed back to his own desk. "Viv, I think you are a valuable resource."

"You got it, Paul," she replied as everyone gathered their belongings and moved to leave. With her gaze on Paul she said, "Another word to the wise: if you have food watch out for Danny – he tends to eat it if it's out."

"I can vouch for that," Martin agreed as they boarded the elevator.

Danny shot him a look knowing that he was referring to the sandwich incident. He still thinks that Martin should have been clearer when he said, 'I saved you half.' With a wounded expression on his face he said, "I resent that comment."

"I think you resemble that comment," Sam retorted as the doors slid shut.

Loud laughter was emanating from the elevator as it made its way down.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

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_Ruby,_

_I was going to write 'Dear Ruby' or 'My Dearest Ruby' but that seemed so phony and unlike us. You were always just 'Ruby' to me. I didn't think I would actually be able to write this letter but here I am. Maybe it's knowing that I have my session to see Lisa tomorrow or maybe it's the four gin and tonic's I had to drink or maybe it is because of the incredible urge I have to talk to you tonight. _

_The entire gang wanted to go to Bar 89 and I agreed. They said they had heard good things about the food and atmosphere. They were so excited that I didn't want to tell them that's where I took you the first time you came to visit me. I wanted to be cheerful but all I could think about was how ironic it was that I was in that place and in a way so were you. You were there, Ruby, with me, tucked away in Viv. I wanted to reach over and put my hand on her chest just to see if your heart beat the same in her as it did in you. _

_I had one drink and then excused myself saying that I had to hurry home and walk Milo even though the dog walker walks him in the evenings now. It was a lie and I don't think they believed me. When I got home I just made myself a very large drink and sat down alone with my dark thoughts. I started to think about how we would have known the baby's sex by now. Would it have been a little girl who we could dress in pink? Or a little boy who most certainly would have been spoiled rotten by my parents? They are anxious to get a grandson, someone to carry on the Fitzgerald name and all that. I wondered if I would be a good father. And then I started to get depressed thinking that I am never going to be one. That the Fitzgerald name would end in our part of the family. _

_That's when I decided to sit down and write you._

_You always had a kind and generous and forgiving heart and I really want you to forgive me. I loved you, Ruby, I did. I still do. But it was not the kind of love that you deserved. I was cruel to promise you my heart when it wasn't mine to give. I didn't even own it anymore. Sam took it from me long ago and it was the one thing she didn't give back when she packed up my stuff in those damn boxes. _

_My mom told me I was an idiot when I broke up with Sam. She said that I needed to be patient and I just didn't get it. I thought that my desire to have a family was more important and while I still want one, I now realize something more important: I love Sam. _

_It hurts me to tell you this but I cannot deny it. It took me a long time to really understand what that means. I thought my dreams of a family were more important but now I know that I cannot live without her anymore and even if she doesn't want a family it's okay because I don't want one if I can't have it with her. I don't even know why I am telling you all of this. I may have these feelings for Sam but I can't imagine that she would take me back a third time – she would have to be a fool and Sam is nobody's fool. _

_I would have been a good husband to you, Ruby. I would have loved you and the baby the best I could and I would have been faithful and true to you. But you're not here anymore. You are with our baby and I can't be there with you. _

_I'm just so tired, Ruby. I've spent the last few months crying for you and our baby – I'm even crying as I write this because I know that I have to let you go. I will always carry the memory of you with me and the imprint you left on my soul cannot and will not ever go away. Goodbye, Ruby, I love you and I miss you._

_I'm sorry that I'm not eloquent or even polite. Blame it on the ramblings of a drunken man looking for absolution._

_Martin_


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

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Jack could not wipe the silly grin off of his face. He couldn't believe how much he liked Elaine Potter. He was introduced to her through his friend and attorney, Ed Felder, at a dinner party. Ed knew her from court sine she worked as a District Attorney. She was forty-two years old and had light brown hair and blue eyes. He felt instantly attracted to her, she made him feel sense of ease and comfort that he hadn't felt in a really long time. They had only been dating for a couple of weeks but he was discovering that each time he saw her he liked her more and more.

She was divorced, too, and had one son, Michael, who was attending Stanford University. She said the problem with her marriage was that she and her husband got married and started their family when they were too young. She didn't have any animosity towards her ex and Jack envied that. He still harbored a lot of resentment against Maria for what she put him through at his deposition.

When he would talk to Elaine about his girls she would listen and if he asked she would offer him advice on how to break through to Hanna, who was still dealing with her anger at him. He wasn't going to get the girls this Thanksgiving since he had them last year but he would get them the full two weeks of winter break. He wondered if Elaine would be spending the holiday with them and he found himself really hoping she would. He couldn't believe he would allow himself to feel such optimism.

Jack was so lost in his thoughts that he almost didn't hear the knock on his door. He looked up and saw Paul and Danny entering to discuss their latest case.

"We have something on Tom Jennings. Some of the missing bonds were just cashed in," Paul shared as he pulled out two files. "Some were by a Tom Jenkins in Florida and a Tom Jensen in Washington, D.C. Check out the driver's license pictures."

He looked at the photos and sure enough. It was their missing person. Tom Jennings was an accountant who was reported missing by his wife but in their course of the investigation they found out that he had embezzled money from several wealthy and powerful clients. So far they were operating under the assumption that might have been his motivation for disappearing.

"He has aliases in both those states. Do you want us to call the offices there and have the agents there look into it?" Paul asked as he took a seat.

"No, I'd rather we check it out on our own. You and Danny go to Florida and Martin and Sam will check out the Washington connection. I'm going to go talk to his wife again. I have a feeling that this bit of news won't be too much of a surprise." After he divided up the team he briefly worried about sending Martin and Sam together but he knew they were no longer seeing each other so if he were to separate them now it would look like he didn't have any faith in their ability to be professional.

"You got it Jack, any souvenir requests? Maybe a little keychain shaped like Florida or a snow globe?" Danny asked with a big grin as he backed out of the office.

"Maybe a little bottle filled with sand and water and 'Florida' written on the side?" he replied.

"You got it," Danny said as he walked out the door.

Jack just smiled and picked up his keys so he could go interview the Jenning's wife. If he was lucky he'd get done in time to take Elaine out to dinner.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

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"I'm sorry the plane is already on the runway," the attendant at the reservation desk replied cheerily to a flushed and breathless Martin and Sam. They got a call from Jack that Danny and Paul had tracked down their missing person in Florida. It seems the wayward accountant had run off with his mistress and was getting ready to catch a plane to the Cayman Islands.

"Can you get us on the next flight back to New York?" Sam asked as she dropped her suitcase on the floor by her feet.

The bubbly attendant smiled and replied, "One moment and I'll check."

Martin blew out a frustrated breath and looked at Sam. They weren't sure if how the investigation was going to go so they didn't book the plane ticket roundtrip. They figured that the worse case scenario would be that they would just have to stay overnight. Unfortunately, their arrival coincided at the same time as every convention in the United States decided to descend on the D.C. area. They couldn't find a single hotel with a vacancy.

"I'm sorry, we are all booked up," the flight attendant answered as her fingers typed away. "We have a flight leaving tomorrow at eleven."

"Are you sure you don't have anything going out today?" Martin asked again.

"Hmm…" she started typing again and said, "I can get you on a flight to Dallas that stops in Chicago and then on to New York which would have you back by 7 a.m. tomorrow."

"No thanks," Sam replied, shaking her head.

He and Sam picked up their bags and walked over to the waiting area to sit down and regroup. He started to think that they could use their FBI credentials to bump a few passengers but since it wasn't a real emergency he knew he couldn't do it.

"How about the _Murianne_?" Sam asked. "Can we stay there?"

"Can't. My dad's having it serviced," he replied deflated. He had considered using the family yacht. It would have been perfect; just him and Sam on the boat, under the stars and he could tell her about how he feels. Damn. It would have been completely perfect.

"Okay, so what do you suggest we do?" Sam asked her eyes on him.

He sighed audibly and said, "I know where we can stay." He pulled out his cell phone and dialed. "Hi, Mom, I need a favor."

XXXX

Martin opened the front door to the house and stepped aside so she could enter and said, "Welcome to casa de Fitzgerald."

"Wow. It's….wow." Sam looked around in awe. She always knew that Martin came from money but he was never obvious about it. Just one look at his suits told anyone that. But looking around at his home she suddenly felt very much like a girl who grew up in a trailer in Kenosha. It was beautiful, classy and elegant. And they were only in the foyer.

"Oh, good, it's you." A woman with a strong Irish accent emerged from a room behind the stairs. She had short bright orange hair and a face full of freckles. She walked up to Martin and gave him a big hug. "You're too skinny." She turned to Sam and said, "You must be Ms. Samantha Spade. I'm Hilde Mulligan. I have worked as the Fitzgerald's housekeeper since this one was in diapers." She thumbed over at Martin who looked up and blushed. "Okay, Marty, your room is all ready and the guest room is set up for Ms. Spade. The both of you should go upstairs to put your bags away and get freshened up while I finish making dinner."

And just like that she walked away.

"So, that's Hilde," Martin said with a grin. "Let's go put our stuff away." He put his hand on her lower back, sending a tingling sensation up her spine, and led her upstairs.

At the top of the stairs Martin led her to the guest room, putting her bag down by a chair in the corner. The room had a four poster oak bed and an antique armoire and dresser. The color scheme was done in soft yellows and blues and there was a large bay window looking out onto the backyard.

"This is a beautiful room," she remarked as she looked around, running her hand along the duvet.

"It was my grandmother's furniture. When she died my mother had it put in here," Martin softly replied before a full synopsis of the sleeping arrangements. "So this is your room, there's the bathroom and I sure Hilde left plenty of towels out for you but just in case there are some in the closet over here. I'm just going to go put this in my room and I'll meet you back here and we can head downstairs for dinner."

"You're not going to show me your room?" Sam asked with a grin. She thought it would be fun to see what Martin's childhood bedroom looked like.

"Um, yeah, sure," Martin tilted his head to the door and Sam followed him down the hall.

The moment he opened the door she instantly saw traces of him everywhere. There were sports trophies and books filling the shelves. Posters of sports teams, bands and a Harvard pendant lined the walls. The furniture was dark cherry wood with blue drapes and comforter. He tossed his bag on the bed and said, "Welcome to the Martin Fitzgerald time capsule."

"I guess it is like stepping back in time." Sam laughed and wandered around the room looking at everything that marked Martin's childhood. She came to a stop in front of one of the posters that hung on his wall and said, "I didn't know you were a Led Zeppelin fan."

"One of the greatest band's in music history," he replied matter-of-factly. She smiled at learning about this new part of him and tucked the information away in her mental file of Martin Fitzgerald. He looked around the room like he was trying to see it through her eyes and added, "I have a lot of memories in this room."

Sam gave him a wicked grin and sat down on the bed. "So, do any memories involve girls and this bed?"

He looked back at her and quite properly replied, "Gentleman do not kiss and tell."

"So, that's a 'no' then?" Sam replied devilishly.

He tried to give her an evil glare but his smile gave him away. He finally gave up and said, "C'mon, I'll give you a tour of the rest of the house."

He walked here through the entire second floor before they moved downstairs. He had just finished showing her the study and moved into the dining room. When he saw that the table was set for twelve people he quickly led her to the kitchen were Hilde was preparing dinner. As soon as he stepped inside he asked, "Who else is coming for dinner?"

She stood at the stove with her back to them and replied, "Your mother thought since you were in town she would invite your sisters to come by as well."

"Parker and Reese are coming for dinner?" Martin asked and Sam noticed a tinge of fear in his voice. She was about to ask him what was wrong when they heard voices coming down the hall. He looked over at her and said, "Sorry, it looks like you are going to have to meet all the Fitzgerald's."

Sam smiled at the look on his face. While she was nervous about meeting his family she thought it was cute that he seemed to be more so.

"Uncle Marty!" A little girl with light brown pigtails ran up to Martin, practically leaping into his arms. Sam felt her heart beat a little faster at seeing how much his niece adored her uncle. After she hugged him she looked over and asked him, "Who's she?"

"Amy, this is Samantha. Samantha this is Amy," he said as he tilted Amy close to Sam so they could look at one another.

"Hi Amy," Samantha said with a smile.

"Hi," Amy shyly replied as she leaned into Martin's shoulder.

"Are you going to introduce the rest of us?" Sam turned and saw a very pretty blonde woman with the same eyes as Martin standing in the doorway looking at them.

"Sam, this is my sister Parker, her husband Curtis and my other niece, Olivia." He then turned to the other couple; a cute brunette with green eyes and a man holding an infant. "And this is my younger sister Reese, her husband Scott and the sleeping lump is Claire."

"It's nice to finally meet you, Samantha," Parker said with a friendly smile but it didn't escape Sam's attention that when she spoke she gave Martin a look that could only be described as mischievous.

After everyone was introduced and settled, Sam chatted with everyone and she was surprised at how comfortable they made her feel. As she sat at the kitchen table talking with Parker she looked around the room, taking in the scene around her. Finally understanding why Martin was so hell bent on having a family of his own. Reese was standing next to Hilde helping her put the food onto platters. Curtis was crouched down and trying to help Olivia with her Game Boy. Amy was just standing in the middle of the room twirling.

When her eyes finally landed on Martin he was leaning against the wall holding Claire and talking to his brother in law, Scott. He looked so relaxed and happy that she literally felt her heart skip a beat at just seeing him standing there holding his baby niece. Before she knew how it happened she mentally pictured Martin standing there holding their own baby. She quickly checked herself and shook off the image not knowing where it came from.

"Samantha?"

She turned to Martin's older sister and said, "Huh? What?"

Parker smiled at her and said, "You zoned out there for a minute."

"Sorry," sam apologized hoping she was blushing too noticeably.

"That's okay." Parker smiled. While she didn't say anything else she saw some kind of twinkle in her eyes.

"Grandma! Grandpa!" Amy shouted as she darted down the hall.

Sam looked up and saw Katherine and Victor Fitzgerald walk into the kitchen. Victor was holding Amy and Katherine walked straight up to Sam and gave her a big hug. "Samantha, it's wonderful to see you."

"It's nice to see you too Katherine," Sam smiled happily. This was the first time she'd seen her since Martin was shot and even though they still would send the occasional email it was strange to see her in the flesh. Nice but strange.

"Samantha," Victor said in a surprisingly friendly tone. He reached out and shook her hand while still holding Amy in his other arm.

"Dinner's ready!" Hilde announced before adding, "Go wash your hands and then meet back in the dining room. No dawdling."

Sam realized just how much authority the feisty housekeeper had in the household because everyone dashed off to do as they were instructed. Martin came up behind Sam and whispered in her ear, "Are you doing alright?"

She turned to look in his blue eyes and replied, "I'm doing just fine."


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

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"I can't believe they are going to get rid of our sanctuary," Parker lamented as she took a drink of her Cape Cod.

During dinner Sam complimented the house and Katherine said she was planning on renovating the basement. Which was big news to the Fitzgerald's kids who were surprised to learn their hangout was going away.

"We haven't hung out down here in years," Martin commented as he looked through a box of his teenage memorabilia. His parents said that if there was anything they wanted to keep they were instructed to take it now or it was going to be donated to charity. Although, going through the box of memorabilia Martin couldn't imagine which charity would want a box full of cassette tapes from the 80s, board games with missing pieces, and used _Mad Libs. _

"Hey, I found an unmarked cassette tape. Do I toss it?" Parker's husband Curtis announced. He was sitting on the floor with his back against one of the sofa's looking through one of the boxes.

"I say we listen to it." Parker walked over from where she was sitting and snatched the tape from her husband's hand.

"I cannot believe I was so into the Corey's," Reese commented as she glanced through old issues of _Teen Beat. _

"I'm guilty of that too," Sam said as she sat cross legged on the carpet between Martin and Reese flipping through old issues of _Cosmopolitan._

Parker held up the tape before she put it in the stereo. "Alright, ladies and gentlemen, does anyone want to place a bet about which one of us this mystery tape belongs to?"

Martin looked at the tape and said, "I think it was yours. I usually labeled mine and Reese always put stickers on hers."

"I'm with you Martin," Reese said from her corner. She turned to Sam and said, "If it is Parker's, get ready for sappy easy listening songs."

Parker put the tape in the stereo and hit 'PLAY' and as soon as the song came on Martin said, "Told you."

"_I don't know how this whole business started, of you thinkin' that I had been untrue… But if you think that we'd be better parted, it's gonna hurt me but I'll break away from you…Well, just give me the sign and I will be gone, yeah…That's how much I feel, Feel for you, baby…"_

"Oh, man, I used to love Ambrosia," Parker said as she started lip synching to the song.

"Martin, do you remember when she used to force us to listen to this music over and over again whenever she drove us anywhere?" Reese asked.

"It haunts me to this day that I know more about Air Supply, Chicago, and Ambrosia than any straight man should." He gave Parker a mockingly dirty look before returning his attention to the albums he discovered behind several other boxes. He heard Sam laugh lightly next to him and it made him smile.

"I can't believe you guys. This tape reminds me of my freshman year at Vassar." Parker walked across the room to look through the bookshelves.

"That was a fun year," Reese said sarcastically. "She was unbearable and so pretentious. When she came home for Thanksgiving she kept calling mom and dad by their first names."

"Please, that implies she called them by their full names. She called them Vic and Kate." Martin looked up from his albums and said, "The only good part is they were so annoyed by her obnoxious behavior that they pretty much left us alone."

"You guys said you totally loved me that year!" Parker shouted, seemingly surprised by this knowledge. Reese and Martin exchanged mischievous glances at one another that Parker did not fail to notice it. "Spill it. What's that look about?"

"Do we dare?" Reese asked Martin. He shrugged his shoulders so she smiled widely and said, "Parker, the reason we loved you so much is because we used your irritating behavior against you."

"Excuse me?" Parker asked with a gaze as sharp as razors.

"Well, you were so annoying that Thanksgiving. You had only been in college for about three months and you came back all full of yourself. You kept saying stuff like 'Seth, my professor prefers I call him by his first name, Seth says….' And then you would insult us by saying, 'You wouldn't know about such things, you're still children…' Please, twelve weeks earlier you were hanging out with us by the pool trying to see who could do a better cannonball."

"Okay, that was kind of obnoxious," Parker agreed. "But I still want to know what you guys did."

Martin decided to spare Reese from having to fess up and said, "Well, that Thanksgiving I told Mom that you were burning some really unusual incense in your room. It smelled like herbs."

Sam leaned in towards him and said, "You didn't?"

"Oh, I did." He turned to look at her and realized that their faces mere inches apart. Apparently she realized their close proximity as well because she quickly turned away.

Parker held her hands up and said, "Wait a minute! Is that why mom and dad gave me a huge 'Just Say No' lecture all night long?" Reese and Martin each smiled guiltily. "You guys suck."

Reese had a serious look on her face and said, "Hey, I feel bad about it now."

"Speak for yourself." Martin corrected. "I was able to sneak out of the house to go see Lisa Webber. I got to third base that night."

"Alright!" Scott and Curtis cheered in unison.

"Don't encourage him," Parker said with her hands on her hips looking like his mom did when he misbehaved as a kid. "What else did you guys do? I know that couldn't have been the only thing."

Reese looked over at Parker before moving to sit between Martin and her husband. "Well, I might have told mom about your birth control pills by saying that college was making you really organized because you even had your Tic-Tacs in a case labeled with days of the week."

Parker's face went red and she shouted, "That was you! Mom made me sit with her for the longest chat of my life. We had to drink tea while she told me about her first sexual experience." Parker tried to sound angry but her laugh gave her away. She found a stuffed tiger on a shelf and threw it at Martin muttering, "Damn you guys sucked." She laughed and said, "Samantha, did you have these kinds of problems with your sister?"

"No, I was the younger one. Bridget moved out when she was eighteen but we had our fair share of fights," Sam replied, happy that Martin's sisters were trying their best to include her in the conversation.

"I found another tape marked, 'Martin's Mix'," Curtis shouted.

"Oh, this should be good," Parker said self-righteously as she took the tape and put it in the player. A few seconds later a steady electronic rock beat began to play.

"_You're leaving no, it's in your eyes. There's no disguising it, it really comes as no surprise to find that you planned it all along. I see it now, becomes so clear, your insincerity and me all starry-eyed. To think that I would have known by now, now, sure as the sun will cross the sky, this lie is over. Lost, like the tears that used to tide me over. Only time will tell, one thing is sure, that time will tell." _

"Asia," Scott smiled at Martin. He started banging his head and said, "Nice."

"I can't believe you were making fun of me for listening to Ambrosia," Parker said. "You were the one who would stand in front of his mirror playing air guitar like some sad rock star."

Martin went wide eyed and glared at Parker for saying that in front of Samantha. It was one of those embarrassing details that should be kept in the family.

Unfortunately at hearing this bit of news Sam perked up and said, "Oh, really?" She grinned widely at Martin and asked. "So, do you still play or did you give it up when you realized you couldn't do it professionally?"

Martin pursed his lips and glared at her but there was no mistaking the humor in his eyes.

"Hey, I used to play air drums," Scott shared trying to help him out.

"Maybe you could get Curtis to play air bass. Then the three of you could form a band and take your act on the road," Sam retorted, enjoying being in on the family gossip.

Parker and Reese started laughing with Sam while the guys feigned hurt for a few seconds before joining in the laughter. Scott started playing air drums while Curtis attempted to join in.

"I love this woman," Parker said as she smiled over at Martin.

He smiled at his sister before looking over at Sam and thinking the exact same thing.


	21. Chapter 21

WARNING: NC-17

XXXXXXX

_You say you want  
Your love to work out right  
To last with me through the night_

You say you want  
Diamonds on a ring of gold  
Your story to remain untold  
Your love not to grow cold

All the promises we break  
From the cradle to the grave  
When all I want is you

'_All I Want Is You' - U2_

XXXXXXX

Chapter 21

XXXXXXX

"It was great meeting you Samantha," Parker said while carrying a sleeping Amy to her car. "I hope we didn't bore you with all that family stuff."

Sam rubbed her shoulders for warmth, smiled and replied, "Not at all. I actually should thank you. I now have some juicy dirt on Martin."

"Funny," Martin said feigning annoyance.

It was a great night. He had to admit he was worried that having the entire family descend on the house would scare Sam but she seemed to have had a good time and blend right in. Thankfully Parker and Reese were really warm and inviting with her; they didn't put her on the spot but let her contribute to the conversation whenever she felt comfortable.

Parker gave a light laugh and put Amy in the backseat next to Olivia. She turned to Martin, gave him a hug and whispered in his ear, "It's so good to see you happy again. She's really great."

"Yeah, I know. Goodnight," Martin replied softly. He looked over at Curtis and said, "Later man, drive carefully."

Sam and Martin said their goodbyes to everyone and stood on the front porch watching them drive away until they were out of sight.

He turned to Sam and said, "So?"

"They are really great. Of course, it helps that they love to make fun of you." Sam giggled. He hadn't heard a Samantha Spade giggle in ages and it sent a thrill through his body.

"Well, believe it or not but they were actually polite tonight. If this hadn't been a school night I shudder to think what they would have said," Martin commented as they went back in the house. He turned around to lock the front door and said, "They really liked you a lot."

He started to turn around when Sam's lips were on his, holding his face in her hands; it wasn't a soft or tender kiss but one full of passion, need, want, yearning. The kiss was as hot and forceful as he remembered and he welcomed it. It was slow, deep, and powerful as their tongues mingled, his mouth still on hers as his arms made there way around her waist, pulling him tightly to her.

He couldn't believe it was happening but relaxed into it all the same. He let go of the past and the future, his worries, his guilt, letting all of reality fall away. He just focused on this kiss, this moment.

"Make love to me Martin." Sam murmured against his lips when they finally came up for air. He looked into her smoldering eyes before kissing her again.

Wordlessly, he lifted her up and headed to the staircase before deciding that given his state of arousal and the very long flight of stairs the living room would be a more logical and practical option.

He carried her to the living room and put her down on the expensive Persian rug. They stood in the darkened room with only bits of moonlight filtering in through the curtains. Seeing Sam in the soft blue light took his breath away. She was so beautiful. He pulled her close to continue kissing and touching as she ran her hands over his chest to unbutton his shirt. He moved his mouth to her neck and she moaned in appreciation. Without breaking contact with her neck he relaxed his arms so she could get his shirt off.

He tugged her blouse out of her slacks and Sam raised her arms so he could pull it over her head. Seconds later her bra followed. He looked her in the eyes as he moved his hands to her breasts, squeezing and teasing. He gently caressed his thumbs over her nipples causing them to harden. His missed the infinite softness of Sam's breasts. She pulled him close again and the sensation of skin on skin was almost a sensation overload and he needed to be inside her.

Sam must have felt the same way because she yanked his pants and boxers off in one quick move. He quickly followed in kind and he pulled her down to the floor. She lay back, never breaking eye contact as he moved to get on top of her. Being a gentleman he propped himself on his elbows and kissed her before sliding inside. They spoke only in murmurs and touches as he penetrated deeply inside of her. She hugged him tight and he could feel her fingers digging into his back. It was painful and exciting.

They continued to look at one another as if the one of them would disappear if they blinked. He continued rocking his hips against hers as the pressure started to build. She kissed him hard and deep as she wrapped her legs around his waist, allowing him to go deeper. Seconds later he felt her clench and spasm and he followed right along with her.

Breathless and panting he rolled off of her. She moved on top of him to lay her head on his chest, draping her arm around him. The smell of her perfume, shampoo and their lovemaking invaded his senses as he pulled her close planning to never let her go.


	22. Chapter 22

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_Still a little bit of your taste in my mouth  
Still a little bit of you laced with my doubt  
Still a little hard to say what's going on_

Still a little bit of your ghost, your witness  
Still a little bit of your face I haven't kissed  
You step a little closer each day

_Still I can't say what's going on_

'_Cannonball' - Damien Rice_

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Chapter 22

XXXXXXX

Sam lay with her head on Martin's chest in disbelief. She could not believe that they just had sex and she was the one who initiated it. Blame it on temporary insanity. The whole evening everything was so familial and homey. She watched Martin's sisters ease with their husbands and even his parents were comfortable in lovingly teasing one another. It was strange to see that side of Victor Fitzgerald – the husband and father. He was so – human.

It made something inside of her yearn for that kind of closeness. Later in the evening when they were in the basement, she didn't feel like she was a guest but part of the family. For the first time in her life there was a part of her that wanted to be someone's wife, actually, Martin's wife. She wondered what it would be like to be a part of this family. It was such a surreal feeling but at the same time it felt so right. It also felt incredibly scary.

She was in such a jumble of emotions that she reacted by attacking Martin before he even knew what hit him. She was surprised that he responded so eagerly but she didn't question it. The whole night, no, the last few months, she wanted to touch him, to hold, to love him like she used to. She knew that they needed to talk but in the end her she just decided to pounce first, talk later.

But now as they lay together, with their breathing the only sound in the room, she knew that they would have to talk. To finally hash it all out, their expectations, their hopes, and most of all their fears. She was formulating how to begin when Martin cleared his throat.

"Um, Sam," he whispered.

"Yeah?" Her voice sounded husky and foreign to her.

"It just occurred to me that we are in my parent's house, in the middle of their living room and my dad has a tendency to wander around the house in the middle of the night." He lifted his head up to look at her and added, "Maybe we should go upstairs."

"You're probably right," she replied as she moved off of his chest.

They both sat up and Martin sorted their clothes, handing Sam her things. She decided to just forgo putting her underwear back on and just make sure she was covered so she put her undies in her jacket pocket. When they were both (mostly) dressed, Martin held out his hand to help her up. He kept his hand in hers as they headed up the stairs exchanging nervous glances. As they neared her room she moved to enter but Martin tugged her hand for them to continue down the hall to his room.

Once inside, she walked to the center of the room as Martin closed the door. He looked over at her and she began wringing her hands worriedly. She saw that he looked as nervous and unsure as he did right before the very first time they slept together. Somehow she found it comforting. Like old times.

"I…." They both began simultaneously. They laughed and the tension level fell a few notches. He gestured for her to go first.

"I, uh, can we sit down?" Sam asked feeling her knees knocking at how nervous she was feeling.

"Yeah," Martin replied as he sat down at the edge of the bed before he thought better of it and scooted further back so he could lean against the headboard. She sat down next to him and crossed her legs.

"There is so much to say I don't know where to begin," Sam started. She paused to consider how to continue when Martin reached out to hold her hand.

"Just say anything you want to – we made a promise on your bathroom floor to always tell the truth even if it hurts," he said quietly and almost fearfully.

"Yeah, we did," she whispered with her eyes on his. "I know I caught you off guard before…sorry about that."

He smiled and replied, "I didn't exactly protest."

Sam laughed nervously and said, "Good point." She licked her lips realizing that they were still swollen from Martin's kisses and tasted like him. "It's just that tonight, spending time with your family it almost felt like were a couple again. I realized how much I missed that, being the other half of a couple with you. I guess I just acted on instinct." He didn't say anything; he just squeezed her hand. "But we have a lot of things that we have to talk about – whether we should try again, what our expectations are, and we need to talk looked away when she said Ruby's name and she was certain that he would let go of her hand but he instead he pulled their locked hands closer to him.

"We do have a lot to talk about but before we go any further I need to say something." Martin looked back at Sam and said, "I love you."

She felt tears well in her eyes and spill down her cheeks.

Martin used his free hand to wipe the tears off her face. "I didn't mean to make you cry but I wanted you to know where I am coming from in all this. That if you were willing to take me back, to give me another chance that I am not going anywhere; ever." He paused before continuing, "I realize now that when I ended things the second time it was just me panicking. According to Lisa it was an attempt to have control when I felt I didn't have any."

Sam tilted her head in agreement. She was well acquainted with therapy with Lisa.

"I know I hurt you and I can never go back and change that. I was just a big mess inside and I am just so sorry that you were the one who got hurt while I was trying to figure things out. I was being a selfish jackass and I can't imagine how you could forgive me for that." Sam felt him squeeze her hand tighter when he said, "As for Ruby, she will always be incredibly important to me, I can't deny that. She changed my life but it's because of her that I know now that you are the one for me. I know it sounds weird but it's true. I just want to know if you feel the same way about me."

Sam wiped the tears off her face knowing that she had to get some stuff off her chest as well. This was the time to do it, this was their defining moment.

"I know Ruby was a good person, she was really hard to dislike and believe me I tried. It hurt a lot to know that you were going to marry someone else and have a family with her. I didn't think I could ever feel that kind of pain and live." Sam's voice was tinged with hurt and anger. "But it hurt me more to see you in so much pain when she died. I wanted to be angry, to not have feelings for you, but I just couldn't. You were a part of me and I couldn't let you go. Worst of all I didn't want to." As Sam said the words she felt a weight lifted off her chest but there was one more thing she needed to know. "Martin, what about the reason you ended it? Have you changed your mind? Don't you still want a family?"

"Not if it isn't with you." He looked at her with tender eyes and added, "Because you're it, Sam. I love you with all my heart, all my soul, even my liver loves you."

Sam laughed with tears in her eyes and said, "Good because you're the one for me, too. I love you, Martin."

They sat there staring at each for a long moment before Martin finally leaned in and kissed her.


	23. Chapter 23

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_"Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions."- Woody Allen_

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Chapter 23

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Sam blinked against the sunlight streaming in through the window. The sky was yellow and pink so she surmised that it must be just past dawn. She rubbed her eyes and rolled over to see Martin sleeping heavily alongside her. His head was tilted towards her, his mouth slightly open. He looked so peaceful that she didn't want to wake him. They stayed up talking, kissing, and making slow but passionate love until they finally had to succumb to exhaustion. She studied his face and felt warm inside when she recalled all the things he told her. He loved her. She never knew that those three little words could mean so very much. She traced her fingers over his eyebrows and a small smile formed on his lips. He peeked out at her from under heavy lids and whispered, "Morning."

"Morning," Sam smiled. "I have to go back to my room before your parents wake up."

Martin pulled her closer and said, "No. Stay."

"We are in your parent's house," Sam reminded him as he started planting warm soft kisses on her face. "Stop it. I have to go back to my room. I don't want your parents to think I am disrespecting them in their house. Besides, we have a flight to catch in a few hours."

Martin moaned but he stopped and moved back. "Okay. You're right."

Sam kissed him quickly on the mouth before slowly extricating herself from Martin's embrace and getting out of bed. Martin was watching her dress with a silly grin on his face.

"What?" she smiled at him as she pulled her top over her head.

"You're beautiful," he said softly as he lay languidly in bed amongst the tussled sheets.

Sam finished putting on her pants and leaned over to kiss him. "You keep saying stuff like that and I'll never get out of here."

He put his hand on the back of her head and kissed her long and hard.

"Martin, I have to go…." She mumbled against his lips.

He pulled back and replied, "Right. Sorry, couldn't help myself." He smiled and leaned back. "See you downstairs."

She pulled back to leave when he grabbed her hand and said, "Oh, and Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"See you go and say things like that…." She moved onto the bed and kissed him deeply and whispered, "I love you." She gave him one more kiss before adding, "But I really have to go."

With that, she quickly hurried to the door and peeked out to see if anyone was in the hall. Seeing it was all clear she hurried to her room and closed the door behind her. She leaned against the door feeling like a naughty teenager.

Scratch that, a naughty teenager in love.

XXXX

Once she was fully showered and dressed Sam headed downstairs for breakfast. As she neared the kitchen she could overhear Katherine and Victor chatting over what they were reading in the paper. It was the kind of comfortable conversation born out of forty plus years of marriage. Katherine laughed at something Victor said and feeling it was safe to enter Sam walked into the kitchen.

"Good morning, Samantha," Katherine said holding up a cup of coffee to her lips. She looked crisp and professional even while sitting in a kitchen having breakfast.

"Good morning, Katherine, Victor." It felt so strange to call the Deputy Director by his first name but last night over dinner he said considering she was a good friend of his son and staying in his home, Mr. Fitzgerald or Deputy Director seemed entirely too formal.

"Good morning Samantha." Victor put the paper down and asked, "Did you sleep well?"

His voice didn't sound accusatory or suspicious but Sam suddenly felt like incredibly guilty. "Fine, great, thanks."

"Good," Katherine replied with a smile. "There's coffee on the counter and please help yourself to some eggs and bacon."

"Don't lie to the girl, Kate," Victor interrupted. "Samantha, those 'eggs' are egg beaters and that 'bacon' is actually soy substitute."

"Well excuse me for being concerned about your cholesterol," Kate retorted.

"My cholesterol levels are fine. Dr. Ristow said I'm healthy as a horse," Victor said with a smile.

"That's because you eat egg beaters and soy bacon," Katherine replied matter-of-factly.

Victor folded up the paper and said, "How can I argue with that? I better get to the office." He stood up and quickly kissed Katherine on the lips before turning to her. "Samantha, it was good to see you. Have a safe trip back."

"Thank you for allowing me to stay in your home," She walked over and shook his hand.

"Anytime," he said as he shook her hand back and headed down the hall and out of sight.

Sam walked back to the island in the kitchen and piled a plate with the imitation eggs and bacon and went to sit across from Katherine. She took a bite of the eggs and was surprised that they weren't too bad.

"So, Samantha, you've meet the entire family. I hope we didn't scare you off."

"Not at all, I had a great time last night. You have a wonderful family," she replied as she salted her eggs.

"Yeah, they're pretty good. I guess I'll keep them," Katherine commented as she took a drink of her coffee. "I know we'd all like to see more of you. I haven't seen Martin look so happy or relaxed in a really long time."

Sam swallowed her mouthful of eggs and said, "I have a feeling you will."

"Good." Katherine smiled and took a final drink of her coffee.

"Morning everyone," Martin happily commented as he entered, making a beeline for the coffee.

"Good morning, son. Alright, I have to get to the courthouse." Katherine scooted her chair back and stood up to leave. She leaned over and gave Sam a quick hug. "Goodbye, Samantha." She then walked over to Martin and gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. "Bye, sweetie, have a safe trip back."

"Bye mom," he replied. As soon as she was out of range Martin walked over and planted a kiss on Sam's mouth. "I wasn't sure if you'd feel comfortable if I did that in front of my mom."

"That was very considerate of you." She smiled and kissed him once more.

Martin sat down in Katherine's vacated chair and stole a piece of bacon off of Sam's plate. "So, what did you guys talk about?"

"She hopes to see more of me," Sam replied plucking up some eggs with her fork.

"Good." Martin leaned forward and throatily whispered, "Because you know, I'd love to see more of you too."

"That's enough of that in my kitchen," Hilde ordered as she marched into the room. "Where's your mother?"

He leaned away from Sam and smilingly said, "And good morning to you Hilde. Mom left for work."

"Oh, well, I wanted to tell her that I called the carpet cleaners like she requested and they said they would have the living room rug cleaned by Thursday," Hilde announced before she headed off into the pantry.

Sam and Martin just looked at one another as they both turned a bright shade of pink.


	24. Chapter 24

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"_For one human being to love another that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks; the ultimate, the last test and proof; the work for which all other work is but preparation." - Rainer Maria Rilke _

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Chapter 24

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"Bride or groom?" A tall blonde man in a tuxedo asked.

"Groom's side," Viv replied with a bright smile.

"This way," he said as he motioned for them to follow him into the church.

Viv linked her arm with Marcus' as they followed the usher to their pew. The church was beautifully decorated with Calillillies, white bunting, and lit candles. It was a wonderful contrast to the dark skies outside. It was certainly going to rain today, the only question being when and for how long. While she was sure some pessimists would argue that it was a bad omen, she preferred to think of it as a good sign; blessings were literally being rained upon them.

She glanced back to look at Reggie who was tugging on the collar of his shirt. It was a battle to get him to wear a suit. He argued that he didn't want to look like a dork in jacket and tie but she argued it was a formal occasion and he was going to damn well wear one. Fortunately he liked Danny so much that he finally, albeit grudgingly, agreed.

"Here you are." The usher gestured for them to sit down.

Viv smiled when she saw that they would be sitting next to Jack who was with Hanna, Kate and a lovely looking woman that she assumed was the new lady in his life, Elaine.

"Hello," she greeted as Jack stood up to give her a hug.

"Hey Viv," he moved to shake hands with Marcus and Reggie before making introductions. "You know Hanna and Kate. Say hello girls." Jack's girls smiled brightly and motioned for Reggie to sit with them. Apparently Reggie thought sitting with two pre-teen girls was more acceptable than sitting with his parents because he moved to sit with them. Jack met Viv's eyes and they both shook their head at how tiresome parenting could be. He motioned to his date and said, "Marcus and Vivian Johnson, I'd like to introduce you to Elaine Potter."

Elaine stood up and shook both their hands. "It's wonderful to meet you. Jack's said nothing but good things about you both."

"It's nice meeting you," Viv replied taking a seat next to Elaine. She looked over at Jack and said, "I still can't believe that Danny is getting married. I never thought I'd see the day."

"Me either. I guess he was just holding out for the right girl," Jack replied as he glanced around the church recognizing a bunch of familiar faces from work.

"True. Emma is pretty great." Vivian was so happy that all her boys were finally getting their personal lives straightened out. Danny was getting married; Jack seemed to have something great going on with Elaine; and at long last, Martin and Sam finally moved past their issues and were happy and open in their relationship. Sam even mentioned that she was thinking of asking Martin to move in – which for Samantha Spade was a HUGE deal.

"Man, I remember our wedding day. I was a nervous wreck," Marcus admitted out loud.

"I was not only nervous but hung over," Jack shared. "A few of my army buddies took me out the night before, you know, one last hoorah. I spent the whole morning throwing up."

Elaine laughed and said, "Me too but for entirely different reasons. I wish I could have had something to drink to calm my nerves." She reached out to hold Jack's hand as she leaned across to look at Viv to ask, "How about you, Viv? Were you nervous?"

"Me? Please, I didn't have time. Between my sisters, cousins, aunts and my mom hovering all over me, poking and prodding, dressing me, putting on my make-up, I couldn't wait to get down that aisle just so they would leave me alone." She laughed at the memory. She sighed, remembering walking down the aisle and seeing Marcus' handsome face waiting for her. It was one of the happiest days of her life.

"I wonder how our boy is holding up back there," Jack commented with his eyes towards the back of the church.

"I'm sure he's a nervous wreck but hopefully Martin is doing what he can to keep him calm," Marcus replied as he leaned back and stretched his arms out along the back of the pew.

Jack and Viv smiled at each other knowing that if Danny was a bundle of nerves that Martin was going to have his hands full.


	25. Chapter 25

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"_In those whom I like, I can find no common denominator; in those whom I love I can: they all make me laugh." - W.H. Auden _

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Chapter 25

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Martin leaned against the wall trying not to laugh at Danny who was pacing back and forth like he was awaiting a jury verdict. He would stop and open the door to see who had arrived before promptly shutting it so he could continue his trail blazing.

"What time is it?" Danny asked, looking at Martin with his big wide eyes.

He knew that he had told him the time less than three minutes ago but he decided to humor his pre-marital neurotic friend and looked at his watch replying, "Four forty-five. Fifteen minutes to go."

"Okay, good." He nodded his head and resumed his pacing.

There was a knock at the door and Danny froze where he stood. Martin laughed and said, "Calm down. I'll get it." He walked to the door and opened it to find Rafi and Nicky on the other side. "Hey, come in. Maybe you can help me calm this guy down."

Rafi and Nicky were both wearing tuxes and looking incredibly uncomfortable. Martin was a little uncertain around Rafi because he knew that he was hurt that Danny had asked him to be his best man.

"Hey, we have your boutonnières." Rafi motioned for Nicky to hand them their flowers.

He took his and deftly placed the flower in his lapel. Danny however had nervous, trembling fingers and stabbed himself emitting a yelp. Martin moved to help him but Rafi beat him to it and fastened the flower for his brother.

"There you go," Rafi said, throwing a quick glance to Martin.

"What time is it?" Danny asked again.

"Four forty-nine," he replied without bothering to look at his watch.

"You okay, Uncle Danny?" Nicky asked in that young boy way where it comes out like an insult. "You don't look so good."

Martin looked at Danny and saw that he was pale as a ghost. "Maybe you should sit down."

Danny just stood there looking at them before dashing to the bathroom. Martin and Rafi just stood there looking at one another while Nicky followed his uncle as if he were going to witness something fascinating. A few minutes later they could hear the faucet running. Knowing that was the all clear sign the two men walked into the bathroom to check on the groom.

Rafi patted his brother on the back and asked, "You alright, bro?"

"Are you afraid to marry Emma?" Nicky asked as he leaned against the wall.

"No, I love her. I want to marry her more than anything." Danny ran some cool water over his face. "I don't know why I'm so nervous."

"It's a big deal, committing to someone for the rest of your life." Rafi offered. "I know I gave you a hard time but she loves you man, anyone can see that."

"He's right," Martin commented as he leaned against the doorframe. "Emma is an incredible woman who thinks you're funny, reasonably good looking, and loves you. Personally I don't get it but she does." He gave Danny a smirk. "Believe me, when you find that one person in the world that you love, you hang on tight and don't let go."

Danny looked at the guys around him and grabbed them all into one big group hug and said, "Thanks."

"Now, that's enough mushiness." Martin pushed Danny back as he reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a travel size toothpaste and toothbrush and handed them to him saying, "Brush your teeth. We're on in five minutes."

Rafi smiled at him and said, "Damn, you are the best 'best man' I've ever seen."

"Nineteen weddings and counting," Martin laughingly replied as he walked back into the other room.


	26. Chapter 26

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"_We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." - Unknown _

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Chapter 26

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Sam walked down the hall of the church looking for the room that they put Emma and the other bridesmaids in so they could put the final touches on their make-up and hair. She needed to find them soon, she had everyone's bouquets. She heard some loud talking at the end of hall and figured that is where they were. She had met Emma's sister and friends at the bridal shower and they were quite the Chatty Cathy's.

She opened the door and was greeted with a flurry of activity. Emma's sister, Jackie and another bridesmaid, Penny, we're trying to help each other get ready. Ashley, the matron-of-honor, was helping Emma put on her veil.

"Hi ladies, um, I have the bouquets," Sam announced as she held up the boxes. All of the bridesmaids hurried over and plucked the boxes right out of her hands. While they were preoccupied with making sure their bouquets were satisfactory, she wandered over to where Emma sat in front of the mirror.

"Hey," she said as she stood behind Emma and watched her in the mirror. Sam could tell that she was trying really hard to sit still so that Ashley could get the veil on but she looked antsy. "Sorry I missed the rehearsal dinner."

"It's fine. I'm just glad that the case turned out to be nothing so you could be here today. Wow, you look fabulous." Emma smiled widely at Sam who was wearing a strapless deep blue dress that was tight on the top with an A-line bottom that reached just below the knees. Tied around her waist was an even darker blue scarf that hung low.

"That's what I am supposed to say to you," she replied grinning. "Danny is going to flip when he sees you walking down the aisle."

Emma was wearing a Vera Wang gown made of ivory silk organza fabric and it had an understated bow accent on her right hip with a chapel length train. She truly looked stunning. She sighed and asked, "Really? I don't look like a cream puff?"

"It's meringue. When you talk about brides you call them meringues," Penny interrupted as she was checking her make-up in the mirror on the other side of the room.

Emma rolled her eyes and said, "Thank you."

"No, you don't look anything at all like a meringue. You look beautiful." Sam reached over to help Ashley get the veil on straight.

"I can't believe how calm you are, I'd be a mess," Sam said as they finished getting her veil on.

"Are you kidding? This," she waved her hands over herself and said, "is all an illusion. I'd be in the bathroom throwing up if I didn't think it would ruin my make-up, which would ruin the wedding photos, which would ruin my mother's life."

"Not to mention that it would make your wedding kiss very unpleasant for Danny," Ashley quipped.

"Nerves are natural," Jackie said as she put on her lipstick. "I was scared out of my mind when I married Dylan. I almost snuck out of the bathroom right before the ceremony." She put the cap back on the lipstick and sat down on a bench to put on her heels. "I might have if it actually opened. But I'm glad I didn't. We've been married nine years and I love that man more everyday; even when he is being a complete pain-in-the-ass. I mean the laundry basket is right there but he just can't seem to be able get his clothes inside of it. What's that about?"

The girls laughed and Emma moved to stand up so they could do the final touches.

"She's right, though, it's natural to be nervous," Ashley contributed. "I mean, it's huge. You are committing the rest of your life to this one person; forever. How can you not be nervous? But I think that once you see Danny at the end of that aisle all those nerves will fall away."

"I hope so because I love that man. I do," Emma said as she made some adjustments to her dress.

Sam looked around and thought how different this wedding was from her own. She and Dennis just eloped to a justice of the peace a few towns over. There was no white dress, wedding party or groom waiting at the end of the aisle. She wondered if these kinds of weddings, the very ones she used to make fun of, were actually designed to remind the couple that when you take that leap called marriage you have a great support system to help catch you if you ever falter.

There was a knock on the door and Emma's dad's voice announced, "It's time!"

"Okay!" all of the women replied in unison.

"Well, I hope to someday soon get to experience those nerves all of you keep talking about," Penny chimed in as she finished getting ready.

"Are you seeing anyone?" Jackie asked as she stood up and walked over to pick up her bouquet.

"No, but I have my eye on the best man. Did you see those blue eyes and dimples? He is hot," Penny cooed as she checked her lipstick again.

"I hate to break it to you Penny but Martin is with Sam." Emma gestured to Sam who was glaring at Penny.

"Damn, the good ones are always taken," Penny said as she looked over at her and said, "Sorry. You're a lucky woman."

"Yeah, I know it," she replied with a forced smile as she walked over to pick up her bouquet.

Emma must have sensed the tension because she smiled and announced, "Okay, ladies, I'm ready to get married."

Sam followed the parade of cheering bridesmaids. While she was annoyed by Penny's comment she was also flattered – after all Martin was with her. She decided to just let Penny eat her heart out because she knew without a doubt: Martin Fitzgerald was hers and hers alone.


	27. Chapter 27

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"_Seduce my mind and you can have my body, find my soul and I'm yours forever." - Anonymous_

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Chapter 27

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Danny stood at the alter staring at the large wooden doors at the back of the church, mentally willing them to open up. He knew that as soon as he saw Emma he would be okay. It was so damn hot up here on the altar; he could feel beads of sweat all over his face. There was a nudge on his elbow and Martin handed him a handkerchief, nodding at his forehead. He gave him a grateful smile and did a quick wipe.

He moved to hand it back when Martin whispered, "Put it in your pocket that way if your palms get sweaty you have something to wipe them with."

"You really do have this wedding stuff down," Danny whispered back as he returned his gaze to the doors.

"I am – the wedding master," Martin joked.

The organ music began and Danny stood up straight as the doors opened and the bridesmaids began their slow march down the aisle. When Sam started down the aisle, Danny stole a glance at Martin who looked like he was in complete awe as he gaped at her. As she neared the altar she met Martin's eyes and gave him a wink before joining the line of bridesmaids opposite them.

The doors closed and the wedding march began to play. Everyone stood up as the doors reopened and there was Emma. Danny suddenly couldn't breathe. She literally took his breath away. She looked so beautiful that suddenly everything disappeared and there was just the two of them. As her father led her down the aisle she met his eyes and gave him her million dollar smile.

For the rest of his life, whenever anyone asked him what he remembered about the day that he and Emma got married his memories would just be in bits and pieces; like his very own highlights reel.

There was the look on Emma's face when they exchanged their vows, her eyes teary and loving.

The sound of his own voice as his throat choked up when he tried to say his own vows while Emma just looked at him and smiled encouragingly.

The feel of her fingers as he slid the wedding ring on her finger and the soft touch of her hand as she slid the band on his.

Hearing the preacher say the words, 'I now pronounce you husband and wife' and him lifting up the veil to kiss her, knowing that this was the first kiss of their marriage.

How that kiss was the most amazing one of his life.

Applause like thunder as they as they broke their kiss and started down the aisle as a married couple.

And the most important thing he would remember was how he finally felt a sense of peace and happiness that he never thought possible. He had found that missing piece and now he was a whole person.

XXXX

Danny was all smiles as he and Emma sat at the table. He glanced around and looked at all his friends and family laughing and talking. This wedding was a true celebration. He heard the sound of a fork clinking glass and looked over to see Martin standing up preparing to make his best man toast. Everyone went quiet so they could listen to Martin – who for 'a wedding master' looked awfully nervous.

"Good evening everyone. I'd like to say a few words about the happy couple. Danny and Emma began their relationship like many new couples, by spending almost every moment together - during which time Emma tried to decide if she could do any better."

Danny gave Martin a steely glare as the crowd laughed.

"Seriously though, if you were to ask Danny or Emma to relate the story of their relationship you would hear some really funny stories; from their disastrous first date to their runaway sea turtle engagement. But the one thing I remember from those stories is that no matter how bad certain moments seemed they were able to laugh through it all. It's easy for couples to laugh when things are good, but if you can laugh together when things are messy, difficult or incredibly hard that is a true testament to your relationship. If you can find a way to always laugh together I am certain that you will always be happy. And knowing Danny and Emma I am certain that their future will be filled with laughter and love.

"I'd like you all to join me in wishing Danny and Emma the very best for their future journey together. And I hope, when they look back years from now on this, their wedding day, they realize it was the day that they loved each other the least."

Everyone cheered and applauded as Danny and Emma shared a kiss.

After they broke the kiss he looked over at Martin who added, "Thank you all for your attention. And let me just say that if you've enjoyed listening to this speech as much as I've enjoyed making it, then all I can do is offer my sincere apologies."

Emma stood up to give Martin a hug and as soon as she moved away he leaned in and gave him a hug and said, "Thanks man."

Martin stepped back and said, "Danny, you're married now. You really have to stop flirting with me."

He laughed as he took Emma's hand and led her to the dance floor as Norah Jones' soulful voice filled the air.

"_Why do I just wither and forget all resistance, when you and your magic pass by, my heart's in a dither dear when you're at a distance but when you are near, oh my..."_

As Danny held Emma and they moved slowly on the dance floor he leaned in and whispered in his ear, "In case I haven't mentioned it you look beautiful."

Emma gave a light laugh and looked up in his eyes and softly said, "You have but it's still nice to hear. Did I mention you look beautiful yourself?"

"Damn, here I was going for gorgeous," Danny teased as he pulled her close to him.

"_It's not the pale moon that excites me, that thrills and delights me, oh no, it's just the nearness of you. It isn't your sweet conversation that brings this sensation, oh no, it's just the nearness of you. When you're in my arms and I feel you so close to me. All my wildest dreams came true."_

"Can you believe we're married?" Emma asked quietly.

"It does feel unbelievable doesn't it?" he replied. "Although I think there was a part of me that always knew I was going to marry you."

"Really?" she asked as she looked at Danny who nodded. "You're just a big old romantic sap aren't you?"

He kissed her and said, "Yes and now you're stuck with me for the rest of your life."

She smiled at him and replied, "Thank god for that."

He smiled back and kissed her long and hard as he looked forward to the rest of their lives. As they song was ending Danny decided to be ultra romantic and dip Emma like they do in those movies from the 1940s. Unfortunately, as he moved to dip her she thought he was going to spin her, so he ended up making her slip and fall on her ass.

Emma looked up at him in disbelief as the entire crowd began laughing and applauding. Someone yelled out, "You're supposed to knock her up, not knock her down!"

Danny felt terrible and when he reached out to help her up she met his eyes and started laughing hysterically. He looked at her for a second before joining in her. He knew that Martin was right when he said they would have a life filled with laughter in all of life's ups and, quite literally, downs.

"_I need no soft lights to enchant me, if you'll only grant me the right to hold you ever so tight and to feel in the night…the nearness of you."_


	28. Chapter 28

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_Though I know I'll never ever lose affection  
For people and things that went before  
I know I'll often stop and think of them  
But in my life I loved you more_

'_In My Life' - The Beatles_

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Chapter 28

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Sam wandered over to the bar and stood alongside Jack who turned to look at her and asked, "Hey, what'll you have?"

"Martini, two olives," she replied as she glanced over to the tables. It was so great to see everyone so happy and cheerful. Vivian and Elaine were talking with Paul and his girlfriend. Reggie was sitting at another table with Nicky, Hanna and Kate looking the role of the cool teenager. Marcus and Rafi were in a heated discussion that based on their gestures was something regarding football while Sylvia talked to Martin as he bounced Danny's niece, Julia, on his knee.

"Here you go." Jack handed her the martini and said, "Some wedding, huh?"

"Yeah, Emma's parents really went all out." Sam smiled as she took a sip of her drink and looked out at the dance floor to see Danny and Emma dancing with the crowd.

"You look really good, Sam," he said with his eyes on her.

"What, in this old thing?" She smiled and replied as she motioned over her very expensive bridesmaid dress.

"No, I mean you look good, happy." Jack looked her in the eyes and added, "You seem, I don't know...content."

She could feel her expression soften as she replied, "I am. I really am." She laughed nervously at the realization that for the first time in her life she was just happy; plain and simple. She paused to look over at Martin who was tickling Julia before turning back to Jack and asking, "How about you? You certainly seem to have an extra bounce in your step these last few months."

He looked over at Elaine and replied, "Yeah, I guess that happiness is contagious." Then he pointed over to Danny and Emma who were attempting to do the hustle – badly. "I think those two are the carrier monkeys."

Sam laughed and said, "You know, I think you're right."

"Come on let's get back to the table before Viv spills all my secrets to Elaine and I'm not there to defend myself."

Sam just smiled as they walked back to the table. Martin looked over at her and smiled as he had Julia wave to her.

XXXX

Martin looked around the table at all of his friends laughing and joking and knew that today was a rare day for them and he intended to enjoy every minute. He looked over at Sam who was laughing at something Viv said and thought about how much he loved this woman. He couldn't believe that there were finally at that point where they were able to accept each other freely and openly.

A slow ballad that he loved began to play so he stood up and put out his hand for Sam and softly asked, "May I have this dance?"

She looked at his hand as if carefully considering his request before she grinned and took it as he led her to the dance floor.

He pulled her close to him as they moved slowly to the soft, sad Rolling Stones ballad. He had always loved this song but the moment Sam entered his life he had associated it with her.

_Childhood living is easy to do. The things you wanted I bought them for you. Graceless lady you know who I am, you know I can't let you slide through my hands. Wild horses couldn't drag me away, Wild, wild horses, couldn't drag me away._

Sam moved her arms around his neck as she rested her head on his shoulder. He let his hands slip down from her back to rest on her hips. He realized that this was a rare thing, dancing with Sam. It wasn't something they often did but holding her like this he made a mental note to do more of it.

"I like this dress a lot more than the last one. You look absolutely amazingly beautiful tonight," he murmured at the top of Sam's head.

"Thank you," she replied as she held him a little tighter. "I'd tell you that you look handsome but I think Penny did enough gushing about how you looked when we were taking the wedding photos."

He smiled knowing that Penny didn't know how lucky she was that Sam opted to not bring her gun with her tonight. The way she kept touching and looking at him he could see Sam trying to decide if it was justifiable homicide. He gave a small laugh and said, "Penny who?"

Sam smiled and leaned up to kiss him. "Good answer."

They kissed a little more before Sam moved her head back to his shoulder. They continued to sway to the music just enjoying the feeling of holding one another. _  
_

_  
I watched you suffer a dull aching pain. Now you decided to show me the same. No sweeping exits or offstage lines could make me feel bitter or treat you unkind. Wild horses couldn't drag me away. Wild, wild horses, couldn't drag me away.  
_

"You did a good job on your speech," Sam softly said.

"Thank you," he replied as he breathed in the scent of her perfume. He sensed there was something else going on in Sam's mind and he knew if he just waited she would tell him eventually.

"It was really nice what you said about Danny and Emma having a life of love and laughter. It really summed them up," Sam said quietly. She gave a soft sigh and added, "It made me think about our future."

Hearing Sam use the words 'our future' caused Martin's heart to pound in his chest. He wondered if she could feel it through his clothes. "What were you thinking?"

"Well, you and Milo have been spending so much time at my apartment I thought that it might be easier for all of us if you guys just moved in…with me," Sam said the words carefully as if she was worried about his answer.

_I know I dreamed you a sin and a lie. I have my freedom but I don't have much time. Faith has been broken, tears must be cried. Let's do some living after we die._

Martin's heart skipped a few beats by Sam's proposition but he needed to know that she wasn't just asking because she thought that's what he wanted. It was but he didn't want her to do it for the wrong reasons. Weddings can fill people's heads with foolish romantic notions. He leaned back so he could look her in the eyes. "Are you sure? This is a big step."

Sam looked up and with sweet, sincere eyes she said, "Yes. I'm sure. Let's move in together."

He nodded his head and kissed her. "Let's do it. Let's live together."

Sam grinned as she moved to kiss him again.

_Wild horses couldn't drag me away, wild, wild horses, we'll ride them some day. Wild horses couldn't drag me away. Wild, wild horses, we'll ride them some day_

He held her tightly to him as they planned their future. Maybe it wasn't the fairytale version he had always imagined but just knowing that she was a part of it was more than enough. They stayed on the dance floor after the song ended and the new one began dancing and kissing and talking and loving 'til the sky turned blue.

End Book VI

To be continued in the Epilogue


	29. Epilogue

Epilogue:

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Martin felt Sam shift in her sleep so he carefully rolled over to look at her. He loved this time of the morning when he could look at her in the early stages of wakefulness. She must have felt him move too because without opening her eyes she smiled and said, "Morning."

He gave her a quick kiss and whispered, "Good morning. How did you sleep?"

She opened her eyes and sighed heavily. "Good, how about you?"

Martin scooted down the bed so he and Sam could face one another and replied, "Fantastic." He folded one arm under his head and draped the other arm across her waist. "So, it's Sunday morning. What do you want to do?"

Sam sunk deep under the covers and dreamily said, "Mmm….we could stay in bed until noon, drink coffee and read _The New York Times_." She slowly ran a hand over his, sending a tingling sensation up his arm.

"That sounds like a wonderful idea…." he murmured in agreement when their idle morning conversation was suddenly interrupted by a tiny voice on the monitor.

"Out! Out!" a voice cried out. Their eyes met in a silent standoff, each daring the other to see which one of them was going to have to get up. "Out! Dada! Out!"

Sam shot her arms straight up and victoriously shouted, "YES!"

He laughed as he got out of bed. "I don't know how to prove it but I am sure you taught her to ask for me in the morning."

She just laughed and snuggled deeper into the bed as he walked out of the bedroom. He wiped the sleep out of his eyes as he padded down the hall to check up on their progeny.

"Out, Dada, out!" Her tiny voiced shouted with increased determination.

"I'm coming, your highness," he replied. He knew that she was getting closer and closer to figuring out how to climb out of her crib. A few times, when he was slow to respond to her pleas for release he walked into the nursery and found her at the corner of the crib with one leg slung over the rails. He and Sam were going to have to start preparing for a fully mobile toddler.

"Dada, out!" She shouted like a convict behind bars. Only instead of prison issue orange this one wore a purple Onesie. He chuckled as a vision of small chubby fists scraping a tiny tin cup against the crib rails entered his mind.

Martin walked into the colorful bedroom and spotted Milo at his usual post under her crib. Since the day they brought Grace home, Milo took it upon himself to keep watch on his new favorite girl.

"Good morning, Gracie," he said as a pair of big blue eyes looked back at him. Gracie had Martin's hair color and eyes but all of her features were most definitely Sam – right down to her full lips and crooked smile. Not to mention having her mother's demanding attitude and independence.

"Hi." Gracie smiled back, showing off her tiny toothy grin.

"Did you have sweet dreams?" he asked as he picked her up. Gracie nodded and sighed softly before cuddling up against him. He just held her a moment enjoying their little bit of quiet time and walked over to sit on the rocking chair by the window. He and Gracie looked out the window overlooking the small back yard of their brownstone. He pointed to a bird that was perched on the ledge of the window and the early morning sun's rays glittered off his wedding band catching Gracie's attention. As she lay slumped up against him she fiddled with his wedding band in fascination.

After a few minutes of morning chit-chat, he carried Gracie to the changing table to get her a fresh diaper. As she lay down she started to sing a tune in her own non-sensical way. While she knew plenty of words the sentence structure was still a little bit dodgy. As he started to change her, he gave her the baby powder to hold knowing that she's very insistent about being a part of the process. "Okay, shake the baby powder."

Gracie shook the powder and handed it back to Martin. He opened the nozzle and applied a liberal dash knowing that she loved it. He closed the nozzle and quickly handed it back to her and said, "Thank you!"

"We'come." She grinned feeling very self-satisfied at being of use.

As soon as Martin fastened the final tab on the diaper he cheerily announced, "All done!"

She clapped her hands in celebration before she ordered, "Down! Down!"

He just laughed and said, "Okay, Princess, let's go see Mommy now." He put her down on the floor and helped her steady herself by holding her hands. Once she had her bearings she started walking to the door and down the hall.

Gracie was still new to walking, her verbal skills outpacing her physical ones, so she would sometimes sway with each tentative step. Like an itty bitty drunk. Martin was always amused by her determination and walked leisurely behind her in case he would have to move in and catch her before she fell or hit her head. As they walked Milo moved alongside them watching Gracie as carefully as he was.

As they followed closely behind her he couldn't help but laugh at their rag tag parade.

Once they neared the master bedroom though, Gracie's pace accelerated and she ran full speed and lunged right into the bed and Sam's sleepy form.

XXXX

As soon as Martin headed to the nursery Sam lounged in bed listening to the baby monitor as he and Gracie shared their early morning conversation. She always knew he would make a great father but his ease with Grace still amazed her sometimes. Even on those rare days when she was fussy, he was patient and tender with her.

There were days when she could not believe this was her life. About six months after Martin and Milo moved in she found herself opening up to the idea of marriage and family more and more. It became more pronounced after Danny and Emma announced that they were expecting. By the time they announced that they were having twins, Martin and Sam had gotten engaged. The funny thing was he wasn't the one who proposed. It was her.

She had been sitting on the stoop waiting for Milo and Martin to get home from their early morning run and it struck her that she was waiting for her family. That's who they all were. So by the time they came up the sidewalk she had made up her mind. He sat down next to her, gave her a kiss and she asked him to marry her. He looked at her and said, "Yes."

Four months later they were husband and wife.

As for Grace, well, that was a bit of a surprise. They had just begun talking about starting a family over dinner one night when two bottles of wine and several slow dances later, poof Gracie was on her way. To her surprise, Sam loved being pregnant. Everyday she woke up to find her body growing and changing. It was an amazing process.

Martin, however, was a nervous wreck.

He would have wrapped her in bubble wrap if she would have let him. It was understandable given all that happened with Ruby so she tried to be patient but some days were harder than others. But he was also incredibly sweet. He would give her foot rubs and back massages without being asked and he would make midnight runs to fetch whatever she was craving.

The day Grace was born was long and painful but the moment they saw her little face they both cried with joy. It was the most amazing moment of both their lives.

She loved being a mother. To see this little person who was the perfect combination of her and Martin. She had his tenderness mixed with her determination. But she also had both their stubborn streaks which her mom and his parents absolutely loved about her. They would proclaim that it was the grandparent's revenge. Finally, Martin and Sam would appreciate what they went through. Each new day Sam was blown away as she watched Gracie's personality grow and change. To see who this newly formed person was becoming.

She had stayed home with Gracie for the first three months but the urge to go back to work was really strong. She was worried that Martin might disagree but he told her that every important woman in his life was a working mom. His own mom, his sisters, his aunt Bonnie, Jamie, even Viv. Sam asked every mom she knew for their opinion. While there were some who said that they would rather stay home with the kids, there were just as many who felt that they could offer more to their kids by keeping their mind stimulated outside of the home. It was a tough choice but in the end she and Martin decided that it was better for Gracie to have a working mom who was happy than a stay at home one who wasn't.

Thankfully they found a great nanny named Frances, who Gracie adored. She was forty eight, heavy set and had short curly hair. Sam was no fool. She knew that her husband was a good looking man and there was no way she would hire some perky twenty-year old to stay in her home.

A few minutes later she could hear her little family coming back down the hall when suddenly a tiny bundle dressed in purple came running towards her. "Mama!" Gracie squealed with delight. "Up!"

"Good morning, sweetie." She helped Gracie climb onto the bed and Sam covered in good morning kisses.

Milo, satisfied that his girl was in good hands, walked around in circles until finally settling on a spot on the floor near the end of the bed and promptly went back to sleep.

"I'm going to go make some breakfast. Who wants waffles?" Martin asked.

"ME!" Sam and Gracie replied in unison. They both knew that she loved waffles.

"Okey dokey." He leaned over and gave quick kisses to his two favorite girls before turning to head down the hall to the kitchen.

"Need any help?" Sam asked, knowing full well he would say no but she still felt better for asking anyway.

"Nah, I got it," he replied as he exited.

Sam and Gracie stayed in bed as the little girl proceeded to tell her all about her dreams. While she didn't understand everything Gracie said she did manage to understand most of it. It seemed her dream involved Milo, her stuffed bunny, and the park; three of Gracie's most favorite things.

As she watched her daughters expressions as she talked she wondered what their next child was going to be like.

Sam smiled to herself thinking about her secret: she was pregnant. It was completely unplanned and unexpected but she knew exactly which night it happened. They had made a deal with Danny and Emma to do a switch off night once a month. They would watch Diego and Michael one Saturday night a month and the next weekend they would take Gracie. Martin argued that they should get two nights since they only had the one kid while they had two. Danny told him that they should have another kid and they'd be even. Sam was almost positive that it was that night they tied the score.

She moved her hand to her belly. Everything about this pregnancy felt different and something inside of her said it was going to be a little boy. She wanted to tell Martin right away but then thought it would be fun to tell him as a part of his birthday present. So in a few more days she would tell Martin that he was going to be the proud father of two. She just prayed that by the time this one came along Gracie would be potty trained.

"Mama waffles," Gracie said pointing to the door where the smell of blueberry waffles drifted in.

"Okay, sweetie, let's go eat." She got out of bed and held Gracie's hand as they headed down the hall with Milo trotting behind them.

As they walked Sam thought about how her life was a million miles from the way she envisioned it. She had a beautiful daughter, a new baby growing in her belly, a loyal dog and a husband she loved in the kitchen making them all breakfast. While it was completely different from what she thought she wanted for herself, there was no place else in the entire world she would rather be.

End Epilogue

End _'Til the Sky Turned Blue_


	30. Teaser

A/N: This fic is a sequel to '_Til the Sky Turned Blue_. I know what some of you are thinking, "NO! We thought we were well shut of it!" and for that, I am sorry. I honestly had no choice. Every time my muse showed up she would tap me on the shoulder and ask, "So, how are Martin and Sam handling marriage and parenthood? What are their kids like? How about Danny and Emma? Does Emma's father still have issues with Danny? What about Viv? Does she like teaching at a university? How's her heart? Is Jack still dating Elaine? How's that going?" Believe me, I honestly did not think I would be back to my first fic but the questions were posed and now I must answer them. If it helps, I am going to do my very best to keep it to two books; three, tops.

TITLE: Red Sky (working title)

AUTHOR: Jennifoofighter

RATING: R

KEYWORDS: MS, D/OC, J/OC, VM, and friendship all around.

SPOILERS/TIMELINE: This is a sequel to my previous fic, 'Til the Sky Turned Blue

ARCHIVE: It will be posting simultaneously at and DISCLAIMER: Hank and Co. own everything _Without a Trace_. No copyright infringement is intended. Heaven knows if I had any control of the show I wouldn't have to write at all.

SUMMARY: Red sky at night, sailors delight. Red sky at morning, sailors take warning.

XXXXXXX

Chapter 1

XXXXXXX

"_Happy endings are just stories that haven't finished yet." - Jane Smith, 'Mr. and Mrs. Smith'_

XXXXXXX

"I'll give you a thousand dollars if you get up," Martin mumbled into his pillow.

"We're married. Your money is my money," Sam replied, stifling a laugh as she rolled over and pulled the covers tighter. "Now, go see what's going on before she burns down the house."

The mattress dipped and rose as Martin got out of bed to inspect the suspicious noise coming out of Gracie's room. It was the kind of noise that didn't set off their federal training alarms but the parental one that told them their child was up to no good. Still grumbling he muttered, "I still don't know how I got stuck with the job of early wake-up patrol and noise inspection. I'm exhausted."

"You don't want to challenge me on exhaustion," Sam retorted. "I had to carry each one for nine months, push them out of my body, nurse them…"

Martin huffed and interrupted, "Are you going to use that excuse every time?"

"Yes," she replied definitively. "Besides, you should be the one to get up since it's you that they always ask for anyway."

Martin reached the door and mumbled, "One of these days I will get Gracie to confess that you taught her to ask for me."

"She's my daughter, she'll never rat me out," she replied as she glanced at the alarm clock that read: 12: 05 a.m. While part of her wondered what her 5-year old was doing up at this ungodly hour a bigger part of her just wanted one more hour of precious rest. So she clasped her eyes shut and tried to will herself back to sleep.

"Then I'll get the boy to do it," Martin said as he opened the door. "I know for a fact he accepts bribes. Two cookies and he'd rat out Barney."

She smiled knowing that he was right. At three-years old Nate was not only a certifiable cookie junkie but he was also the family tattle-tale. He never did it to be malicious; he was just a good, honest kid. Unlike his diabolical older sister who knew that his silence could be bought for a price; usually one involving chocolate chips.

She heard Martin walk down the hall and knock on Gracie's door before he opened it. She couldn't make out what he was saying but judging by his tone their girl wasn't up to too much mischief so Sam pulled the pillow over her head and prayed for sleep.

It didn't work because she was still wide awake when Martin returned a short while later. He slowly shuffled his way back to bed and she followed him with her eyes asking, "What was she doing?"

"Jumping on the bed smoking a cigarette," Martin replied as he crawled back into bed. "I told her to use an ashtray and keep it down; Daddy's trying to sleep."

Sam lifted her head and looked at him in disbelief. "What?"

"Relax. She's just excited about starting her first day of school. She was reorganizing her backpack – again," Martin replied with a yawn as he relaxed back into the bed. "I helped her put everything away and put her back to bed."

Sam rolled back over and curled up against him, tucking her head in the nook between his neck and shoulder. Her eyelids were heavy but there was no denying that she was awake. She could tell by Martin's breathing that he wasn't asleep yet either. "Can you believe she's starting kindergarten? It seems like just yesterday that we brought her home from the hospital."

"Mm-hmm," he mumbled as way of a reply.

Sam could still recall just how much Gracie weighed that day. Her arms still remembered the feeling of her little body bundled up in a blanket as she carried her carefully down the hall towards her room for the very first time.

XXX

_She watched as Martin hustled ahead of her to make sure the pathway was clear of any possible dangers. He would have carried her and the baby if she had asked. She moved slowly partly because of her need to be careful but also because she was still sore; feeling like she was stretched out and broken in a way she didn't think possible. She reached the door and Martin moved Milo aside so Sam could walk into the room. _

_They had decorated the nursery in pale green and blues and the furniture was rich honey oak color. Sam nervously walked Grace to her bassinet and carefully laid her down. _

_Martin tiptoed up behind her and whispered, "Now what do we do?"_

"_Well, according to all the baby books I am supposed to sleep whenever she does so I guess I should go take a nap." She said and Martin nodded his head in agreement although neither one of them made any move to leave. She looked down at her tiny sleeping daughter; small and perfect. Gracie's face was still pale pink and she worked her mouth in suckling motion as she slept. _

"_I can stay and watch her while you sleep," Martin offered. His gaze focused on the baby. _

"_Um, I don't know. I mean, we can't take turns watching her all the time. She has to sleep alone eventually." She leaned close and rested her head on his shoulder. She was completely drained and exhausted but she was also hesitant to leave Gracie alone. "Then again, maybe we should stick around for a little while." _

"_Okay," Martin replied. They stayed like that for a few minutes, just watching her sleep. Martin tilted his head toward hers and whispered, "Can you believe she is ours? I keep thinking all of this is a dream and I am going to wake up any minute." _

_Sam laughed and snaked her arm around his waist. "I just spent over 30 hours in labor. Believe me, it's no dream; this is very much real." _

_Martin put his arm around her shoulder and pulled her to him. He kissed her head and said, "You were incredible."_

_Sam looked down at Grace and replied, "Yeah, well she was worth it." She paused and added, "Of course, when she's older I am definitely going to remind her how much I went through to bring her into this world." _

_He laughed. "It's an excuse that has worked for mothers for centuries."_

_She felt Milo's tail brush against her leg and she looked down to see the big Labrador move to sit under Grace's crib. He walked around in circles before finally finding a good spot to lie down and go to sleep. Sam was about to comment but when she opened her mouth instead of words she yawned. _

"_Why don't we put you to bed too? Milo can stand guard." He clicked on the white baby monitor, grabbed her by the shoulders and turned her around to move her out of the room. "The baby monitor is on and we can hear everything from the bedroom." _

_She hated to leave but she knew that she needed to sleep now because Gracie was going to need to nurse again in two hours. They walked into their bedroom and Martin clicked on the other monitor as Sam lay down. He sat on the edge of the bed to make sure it was working. He gave her an unsure look and said, "It's quiet." _

"_She's sleeping," she replied. _

"_How do we know what to listen for? How do we know if it's working?"_

_Sam considered and said, "Go back to her room and say something into the monitor. I'll stay here and listen." _

"_Good idea," he replied as he walked out of the room. A few seconds later she heard Martin's voice on the monitor. "Testing, one, two, three." Martin poked his head in and asked, "Did you hear me?" _

"_Yeah, loud and clear," she answered._

_Satisfied they both laid down on the bed to nap. However, as tired as Sam was she could not seem to relax enough to sleep. She cracked open an eye and saw Martin's gaze focused on the nightstand where the baby monitor sat. She took a deep breath and exhaled hoping to calm her nerves but no luck. She scooted next to Martin and he shifted so they could both be comfortable. She wanted to sleep but she found that she kept trying to listen for any unusual sounds. Conceding defeat she raised herself up on her elbow, looked at Martin and said, "Maybe we should just bring her bassinet in here?" _

"_Good idea," he replied as he moved out from under her, hopped out of bed and over his shoulder added, "I'll be right back."_

_A few minutes later Martin rolled the small bassinet into their room with Milo in tow. He was pushing it slowly, doing his best to not wake the sleeping infant. He positioned it next to her side of the bed, checked to make sure Gracie was still asleep and then rejoined her on the bed. Milo moved to the corner of the room and plopped himself on his pillow bed and fell right back to sleep. _

Sam moved closer to the bassinet and lay on her side with one hand resting on the edge of the bassinet. Martin moved in to spoon her from behind, his own hand resting lightly over her hip. She closed her eyes and miraculously fell right to sleep.


End file.
